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A brilliant but daring high school senior creates a multi-million dollar video game by stealing the concept from a big-time CEO.
I know that a lot of people won't agree with me on what I'm about to say, but for me a logline has to say what the movie is about and make people interested enough to watch the movie and see how the story goes. So what is your movie about? What I got from your logline is that it's about a high schooRead more
I know that a lot of people won’t agree with me on what I’m about to say, but for me a logline has to say what the movie is about and make people interested enough to watch the movie and see how the story goes.
So what is your movie about? What I got from your logline is that it’s about a high school student who steals the concept for a video game from some big-time CEO and makes millions out of it.
I don’t think it has to say what happens next and what the CEO does to the kid. If people want to find out then they have to watch the movie.
For me the logline works and got me interested in watching the movie to find out what happens to the kid.
The impression that I have is that people want to know the entire story just by reading the logline. If we get to know the whole story just by reading the logline then why would we see the movie if we already know what’s going to happen?
That’s just my opinion.
By the way here’s the logline of “The Social Network”:
Harvard student Mark Zuckerberg creates the social networking site that would become known as Facebook, but is later sued by two brothers who claimed he stole their idea, and the cofounder who was later squeezed out of the business.
See lessAn ambitious woman takes over her uncle?s struggling restaurant, determined to bring the business back to life. When the staff that don?t meet Wendy?s standards begin to disappear, the remaining employees start to question just how dedicated to her job their new manager might be. You?d better hope you?re on next week?s roster.
What if Wendy was not the killer and she had to figure out who is killing her staff and prove to the police that she's innocent? Then you would have mystery.
What if Wendy was not the killer and she had to figure out who is killing her staff and prove to the police that she’s innocent? Then you would have mystery.
See lessWhen a young girl wakes up in the forest, struggling to remember what brought her there and made her pass out, a friend appears to help her get back home.
When I read the logline I immediately figured out that her friend was behind of what happened to her. dpg guessed it to. So if that's your twist then it's not a very good one. I also don't think the drug will be a big surprise either. That said I think you should go with the second logline that youRead more
When I read the logline I immediately figured out that her friend was behind of what happened to her. dpg guessed it to. So if that’s your twist then it’s not a very good one.
I also don’t think the drug will be a big surprise either.
That said I think you should go with the second logline that you posted. But I would explain better what the friend does to the young woman. It’s a horror movie so does he torture her? What horrible things does he do to her?
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