1. Posted: October 5, 2013In:

    Based on the true story of a nurturing, but ambitious television series producer struggling to achieve emotional balance and fulfillment in her own life against the backdrop of teeming behind-the-scenes drama and the perpetual antics of the actors, crew and network executives involved in the production of her long-running, daily soap opera.

    BlackstonM

    Thanks so much for your input. The producer is a woman in her late 30's who begins to feel her own biological clock ticking and realizes she has never been in the kind of stable, committed romantic relationship she emotionally needs and has dreamed about for herself. Her antagonist in some respectsRead more

    Thanks so much for your input.

    The producer is a woman in her late 30’s who begins to feel her own biological clock ticking and realizes she has never been in the kind of stable, committed romantic relationship she emotionally needs and has dreamed about for herself. Her antagonist in some respects is the very career she loves and collectively the people who surround her daily. She is nurturing, caring, and beloved by the cast and crew of the daily television drama she produces, but their needs, entanglements, and idiosyncrasies chip away at her emotionally leaving it difficult for her to focus on creating the fulfilling life she imagines for herself.

    Does this help explain more about the protagonists inner conflict? Do you have any suggestions for how I can incorporate this more into a short log line?

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  2. Posted: October 5, 2013In:

    When a playboy, slacker returns to join his father?s growing corporate empire, tensions mount between his toe-the-line older brother over who is better suited to run the company.

    BlackstonM

    I agree with the comments above that we need a missing element of urgency or explanation in terms of why the playboy son, whom I presume is probably the protagonist, would return at this particular time to vie for control of his father's corporate empire.

    I agree with the comments above that we need a missing element of urgency or explanation in terms of why the playboy son, whom I presume is probably the protagonist, would return at this particular time to vie for control of his father’s corporate empire.

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  3. Posted: October 5, 2013In:

    A petty thief, an illegitimate son and a father; the trio are sitting at the same restaurant unknowingly, only to discover later that their paths will meet when the biggest heist will make them come together at some point only to reveal the deeper connection and there is more to lose than the money.

    BlackstonM

    I'm confused about "the biggest heist"? Are the 3 restaurant patrons involved in the heist together? I'm presuming a connection, possible an unknown family connection, between the 3 people, but I'm not sure of that. Are they involved in a "heist" as perpetrators, witnesses or investigators? I thinkRead more

    I’m confused about “the biggest heist”? Are the 3 restaurant patrons involved in the heist together? I’m presuming a connection, possible an unknown family connection, between the 3 people, but I’m not sure of that. Are they involved in a “heist” as perpetrators, witnesses or investigators? I think there needs to be more clarity in terms of what brings the 3 characters together and what is their conflict.

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