What does “cope with the knowledge…” mean? What’s the action line, the visual on that? Isn’t it rather the case that the knowledge of their imminent death forces them to reflect upon and confront the choices they made (or didn’t make) that has brought them to the present state of affairs? Are they not passing final judgement on how they lived their lives just before the firing squad passes its final judgement?

“Depend upon it, Sir, when a man knows he is to be hanged in a fortnight, it concentrates his mind wonderfully” — Samuel Johnson. But concentrates on what?

And if the priest is trying to save her soul before she dies, that’s sounds pretty goal-driven to me. Desperately, urgently goal-driven (since there is, no doubt, a ticking clock: death at dawn, high noon or whenever).

kbfilmworks:

Obviously, we don’t see eye to eye. That happens. Even so, I don’t doubt your intelligence, your integrity, your passion and commitment to producing quality art.

And I commend you for your fortitude: you’ve been hanging around this precinct long enough to know that posting a logline is akin to standing your story in front of a firing squad.

I think you have an interesting germ of a concept, but the logline… well, enough said.

I wish you well with this story and every success with your writing.