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  1. Posted: October 22, 2014In: Public

    ?In the future, when only pockets of civilization have survived a worldwide famine, one young nomad will have to overcome prejudices and allegiances if he is to learn the four lessons that his dead guardian tasked him with pursuing as his dying wish.?

    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on October 22, 2014 at 7:03 am

    Why does he have to learn 4 lessons? What does fulfilling tasks given to him by a dead man have to do with his living/surviving in the here and now? (The objective goal of the protagonist should face the future, not the past.) What's at stake? What does he stand to gain by learning, stand to lose byRead more

    Why does he have to learn 4 lessons? What does fulfilling tasks given to him by a dead man have to do with his living/surviving in the here and now? (The objective goal of the protagonist should face the future, not the past.)

    What’s at stake? What does he stand to gain by learning, stand to lose by not learning?

    And who — not what — opposes him? “Prejudices and allegiances” are abstractions. They need faces; they should be embodied in an antagonist.

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  2. Posted: October 18, 2014In: Public

    Los Angeles, 1956. An ambitious prosecutor's investigation into the suspicious death of a wealthy businessman uncovers the murder of a young prostitute twenty years earlier. His suspects in both crimes: the mother of the girl he loves and his father, the Chief of the LAPD.

    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on October 20, 2014 at 12:31 pm

    And I think it's always a good thing when the protagonist starts breaking rules, trespassing in other peoples' domain. And he must: the plot is a conspiracy against the protagonist. The rules, the "No trespassing" signs are designed to maintain the status quo, to stop him from achieving his objectivRead more

    And I think it’s always a good thing when the protagonist starts breaking rules, trespassing in other peoples’ domain. And he must: the plot is a conspiracy against the protagonist. The rules, the “No trespassing” signs are designed to maintain the status quo, to stop him from achieving his objective goal.

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  3. Posted: October 18, 2014In: Public

    Los Angeles, 1956. An ambitious prosecutor's investigation into the suspicious death of a wealthy businessman uncovers the murder of a young prostitute twenty years earlier. His suspects in both crimes: the mother of the girl he loves and his father, the Chief of the LAPD.

    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on October 20, 2014 at 12:31 pm

    And I think it's always a good thing when the protagonist starts breaking rules, trespassing in other peoples' domain. And he must: the plot is a conspiracy against the protagonist. The rules, the "No trespassing" signs are designed to maintain the status quo, to stop him from achieving his objectivRead more

    And I think it’s always a good thing when the protagonist starts breaking rules, trespassing in other peoples’ domain. And he must: the plot is a conspiracy against the protagonist. The rules, the “No trespassing” signs are designed to maintain the status quo, to stop him from achieving his objective goal.

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