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After the death of his estranged mother, a young Wall Street executive is haunted by the ghost of his father until he mourns her properly.
As the others have said.And what does "mourn her properly" mean anyway?I think it would be better if the role of the father is to offer consolation rather than persecution.
As the others have said.
And what does “mourn her properly” mean anyway?
I think it would be better if the role of the father is to offer consolation rather than persecution.
See lessa lost military runner must team up with a soldier of the warring nation, after splitting with his navigator, in the forest they now intend to cross resourceless, before the lack of intelligence-he must relay-causes more casualties..
As written, the logline seems to say the runner know he's partnering up with the enemy.? ?Which raises Richiev's question:? why? But then you clarify:>>>the midpoint reversal could be him discovering his identity as the polyglot-translator of the opposing nationThe Big Reveal:? he discoversRead more
As written, the logline seems to say the runner know he’s partnering up with the enemy.? ?Which raises Richiev’s question:? why?
But then you clarify:
>>>the midpoint reversal could be him discovering his identity as the polyglot-translator of the opposing nation
The Big Reveal:? he discovers he has partnered up with his foe.
So the runner doesn’t know his true identity when he partners up and that’s the way the logline should be written, based on what the runner knows at the time of the inciting incident, not what he is going to discovery at the mid-point.
But then why would the translator partner up with the runner, someone he knows to be the foe?
Seems to me the translator has the more interesting dramatic dilemma.? Maybe the story should be written from his pov, with him as the protagonist,
fwiw
See lessWhen a greedy bounty hunter fails to capture a regicide and is falsely accused of being her ally, the two must work together to fight outlaws and retrieve sacred relics to earn a wish and clear their names.
>>> greedyHow is that a character flaw that threatens the ability of the bounty hunter to achieve his objective goal?? And isn't being a bounty hunter is a risky business and can take a lot of work, a lot of time?? Not to mention travel expenses?? So doesn't he earn his bounty?>>>aRead more
>>> greedy
How is that a character flaw that threatens the ability of the bounty hunter to achieve his objective goal?? And isn’t being a bounty hunter is a risky business and can take a lot of work, a lot of time?? Not to mention travel expenses?? So doesn’t he earn his bounty?
>>>a regicide?s ally
IOW:? a co-conspirator
>>>escape the government
Extraneous for the purpose of the logline.? What matters is the ultimate objective goal:? clear his names, prove his innocence,
So:
When a bounty hunter is falsely accused of murdering the king, he must….
Well, must what?? I’ll say it again: that he must exonerate himself by finding some wish-granting place rather than track down and capture the real killers doesn’t ring right for me.? Why tag him as a bounty hunter — and then not put his unique skill set to use in tracking down the real killers?? That’s his character strength, his metier.
The general guideline is that there should be a relevant match between a dramatic character and his dramatic task such that the character attribute defined in the logline is either congruent or antithetical to the task (objective goal).
By congruent I mean the defining characteristic makes the protagonist the right man for the job. He’s got the right stuff to succeed.
By antithetical I mean the defining characteristics makes him the wrong man for the job..? He’s got the wrong stuff, a character flaw, that he must overcome to achieve his objective goal.
But when I look at this logline I fail to see the relevancy between the character and his quest, either congruently or antithetically.
I realize and appreciate that you’re trying to come up with a new twist on an old trope, have a wish-granting place rather than a wish-granting totem or prop.? But in cinema, heroic characters (and he’s ultimately an heroic character, isn’t he?) have to earn their objective goal, actively make it happen for themselves, by themselves.? ?Luke Skywalker (then) and Rey (now) don’t seek the Force to merely stand by and let the Force work it’s mojo. The magical, mystical power of the Force is what they must learn to use.
The climax of the film should entail the ultimate test of the character, the moment of character truth, that decides the outcome.? But this logline seems to set up an ultimate test of geographical truth for the wish-granting place. The outcome depends on the place — not the protagonist.? The protagonist is rescued when he should be the one doing the rescuing.
That’s not how magical, mystical powers work in the monomyth.? I can think of no successful fantasy or scifi movie that displaces the pivotal role of determining the outcome at the climax from a person to an impersonal place (or object).? Can you?
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