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A snide vigilante with a super-elastic body is pestered by a reporter who insists that she fight against an emerging evil that is determined to conquer the world.
Better. ?I like that it specifies exactly the McGuffin at stake.But why would some one with an "ultra-malleable" body be an "executioner" in the 1st place? ? What happened to the ?gymnast? ?That makes more sense; that is, there is logical match between the character's initial role and her defining cRead more
Better. ?I like that it specifies exactly the McGuffin at stake.
But why would some one with an “ultra-malleable” body be an “executioner” in the 1st place? ? What happened to the ?gymnast? ?That makes more sense; that is, there is logical match between the character’s initial role and her defining characteristic.
And what is the trigger event? ?How does she get involved in that assignment to begin with? ?There are so many ways, so many plots, so many conspiracies whereby a super heroine in the making can earn her reputation. ?What hooks her into this assignment? ?What’s the cause-and-effect link?
And “becomes a superheroine” ?is superfluous. ?Deliver on how she becomes one in the script proper.
See lessIn a nuclear post apocalyptic world, a group of human survivors receive a distress signal coming from a nuclear bomb shelter and they set out on a rescue mission, only to discover an unimaginable horror inside.
I think Richiev's modification is a step in the right direction. ?But I think that "unimaginable horror" needs to be made, well, less unimaginable since a CGI crew is going to have to create a visual of the "horror". More to the point, ?we need to know exactly what the threat is that this "horror" pRead more
I think Richiev’s modification is a step in the right direction. ?But I think that “unimaginable horror” needs to be made, well, less unimaginable since a CGI crew is going to have to create a visual of the “horror”.
More to the point, ?we need to know exactly what the threat is that this “horror” poses to the survivors.
A lot of people think tarantulas are horrible in appearance and find it unimaginable that anyone would want to keep them as pets. ?But appearances are deceiving; tarantulas pose no threat to humans and some people handle them as pets.
So I suggest the logline be reworked to indicate what the jeopardy is, the threat this “horror” entails. ?Because that threat determines the objective goal, what the survivors must do… to continue to survive.
fwiw
See lessA dissatisfied 30-something-year-old woman risks her long-term relationship to figure out if she?s missing out on a more exciting and passionate love life.
>>>There was a movie in the 80?s called ?Nina takes a lover?Okay, but ?"Nina" is the story of a married woman's ?fling with a specific lover, not someone playing the field, randomly "Looking for Mr. Goodbar"."Looking for Mr. Goodbar" (1977) is the movie that came to mind after reading thisRead more
>>>There was a movie in the 80?s called ?Nina takes a lover?
Okay, but ?”Nina” is the story of a married woman’s ?fling with a specific lover, not someone playing the field, randomly “Looking for Mr. Goodbar”.
“Looking for Mr. Goodbar” (1977) is the movie that came to mind after reading this logline. ?And it’s a favorite because the promiscuous sex life of the protagonist is not dangled as voyeuristic bait, gratuitous titillation for the audience. ?It’s an edgy and ?insightful portrayal of ?emotional masochism.
It’s on my list of movies to write a logline for as practice, and it’s a tough one. ? But then “Looking for Mr. Goodbar” was adapted from ?a best-selling book. ? The success of the book sold the movie project– not a logline.
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