1. Posted: October 25, 2016In:

    When demons plan to steal the devils throne, a greedy rich lawyer dealing for his soul is the only one able to do something about it.

    dpg Singularity

    >>he must save himself beforeSave himself from what? ?And how? ?What is his specific objective goal?And maybe it serves him right for being a rich and greedy lawyer. As Richiev said, he doesn't seem to be a sympathetic character, one an audience would naturally root for.

    >>he must save himself before

    Save himself from what? ?And how? ?What is his specific objective goal?

    And maybe it serves him right for being a rich and greedy lawyer. As Richiev said, he doesn’t seem to be a sympathetic character, one an audience would naturally root for.

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  2. Posted: October 25, 2016In:

    Discovering his memories have been manipulated, a security analyst must use clues hidden by himself to retrieve his real memories and expose his employer’s secret control over society.

    dpg Singularity

    Why must he know about a lost week in the past? ?What difference does will it make in his life in the future (aka: the stakes)? And what does an "experiences dealer" do?

    Why must he know about a lost week in the past? ?What difference does will it make in his life in the future (aka: the stakes)?

    And what does an “experiences dealer” do?

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  3. Posted: October 23, 2016In:

    Losing hope she?ll be rescued, a brutally assaulted young woman despairs over ?what ifs? and seeks peace for all that will never be in the moments before her death.

    dpg Singularity

    Deanna:In ?my personal, very subjective, and very conceited (what's that you say, you noticed?) opinion, you're short film would make a great 1st Act to set up a more compelling story. ?She has?all these regrets, acknowledges all her mistakes, make all these if-only resolutions/prayers/promises, makRead more

    Deanna:

    In ?my personal, very subjective, and very conceited (what’s that you say, you noticed?) opinion, you’re short film would make a great 1st Act to set up a more compelling story. ?She has?all these regrets, acknowledges all her mistakes, make all these if-only resolutions/prayers/promises, makes her peace with dying. passes out… end of Act 1.

    Act 2: ? She comes to in an intensive care ward. ?She’s been rescued just in time. ?She recovers… slowly, but she recovers. ?Now comes the hard part: ?fulfilling her promises to herself, her vows to God.

    In my personal, very subjective, and very conceited opinion, dying is the easy ending. ? All your character has to do ?– can do– is… absolutely nothing. ?Living, on the other hand, ?is hard. ?Hard work for the character. ?And, yes, hard work for you as the writer. ?But also, imho, the effort could lead to a more compelling story about your character and a more promising future for yourself.

    Whatever. ?It’s your vision, your story. ?Best wishes with your writing.

    fwiw

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