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Ian Hemlock is swept away to a magical land after he falls out of an attic window and embarks on a quest to find a slipper for a dead girl who can help him find his missing father.
I think the the slipper does not need to be mentioned here becuase it is not the main conflict. The conflict is finding his father. Anything that leads to that should not be in the logline. "after he falls out of an attic window, a young boy embarks on a quest to find his missing father" Boom, shortRead more
I think the the slipper does not need to be mentioned here becuase it is not the main conflict. The conflict is finding his father. Anything that leads to that should not be in the logline. “after he falls out of an attic window, a young boy embarks on a quest to find his missing father” Boom, short and sweet 🙂
See lessFor 10 years this man has been having accurate visions of events seven days into the future. Last night he saw his own murder at the hands of a woman he doesn't know.
The logline is too long as it stands. Shorten it and only, ONLY keep the essential elements. Maybe he has been having these dreams for 10 years but we don't need that in the logline. If it is essential then it needs to be changed. The main point here is that he has had a dream about his own death. LRead more
The logline is too long as it stands. Shorten it and only, ONLY keep the essential elements. Maybe he has been having these dreams for 10 years but we don’t need that in the logline. If it is essential then it needs to be changed. The main point here is that he has had a dream about his own death. Let’s stick with that. It would be more interesting if he DID know the hands in the dream. ” A man has a dream about his own death and in it he recognize his murderer”
See lessFor 10 years this man has been having accurate visions of events seven days into the future. Last night he saw his own murder at the hands of a woman he doesn't know.
The logline is too long as it stands. Shorten it and only, ONLY keep the essential elements. Maybe he has been having these dreams for 10 years but we don't need that in the logline. If it is essential then it needs to be changed. The main point here is that he has had a dream about his own death. LRead more
The logline is too long as it stands. Shorten it and only, ONLY keep the essential elements. Maybe he has been having these dreams for 10 years but we don’t need that in the logline. If it is essential then it needs to be changed. The main point here is that he has had a dream about his own death. Let’s stick with that. It would be more interesting if he DID know the hands in the dream. ” A man has a dream about his own death and in it he recognize his murderer”
See less