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A wealthy oblivious drawing artist raised by animals unfreezes a painted river to stop his artistic ego from not seeing his forest-dwelling family before he moves away from home.
I do not understand the story world. If the kid wants to leave home, where would he go? Is the larger world full of human-like animals or is he crossing over to our world? Does he literally paint over the river or does he create a painting of the river? Is he rich and successful before the story begRead more
I do not understand the story world. If the kid wants to leave home, where would he go? Is the larger world full of human-like animals or is he crossing over to our world?
See lessDoes he literally paint over the river or does he create a painting of the river?
Is he rich and successful before the story begins?
Is the inciting incident the painting, or the discovery of the effects of the painting?
I would focus on the sites suggested log line format for now. [Flawed Protag] [Event] [Action]
When left alone by his busy father at his office, a young child who believes his father is a professional spy must help deliver coded messages in order to win his father’s pride.
You have an interesting story, but I would work on the logline a bit more. My interpretation is that the story goal is to deliver the letters from the father's desk to other cubicles across the office, without getting caught. This would make the main antagonist the person who told him not to disturbRead more
You have an interesting story, but I would work on the logline a bit more. My interpretation is that the story goal is to deliver the letters from the father’s desk to other cubicles across the office, without getting caught. This would make the main antagonist the person who told him not to disturb his father.
See lessThis might help think of the story a new way:
After an imaginative child is told to sit still he embarks on a top-secret mission to…
After a timid young adult is saved from armed assailants by a beautiful vampire, he is manipulated and trained by her coven to track down his elusive uncle: the de facto leader of the vampire hunters.
3rd Revision (edit to fix typos)After a timid young adult, ignorant to the supernatural, is saved by a beautiful vampire from an attack orchestrated by his uncle attempting to eliminate opposition to his rule, they work together to track down and kill his newfound relative: the de facto leader of thRead more
3rd Revision (edit to fix typos)
After a timid young adult, ignorant to the supernatural, is saved by a beautiful vampire from an attack orchestrated by his uncle attempting to eliminate opposition to his rule, they work together to track down and kill his newfound relative: the de facto leader of the Vampire Hunters before they themselves are killed.
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