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  1. Posted: October 9, 2015In: Student Loglines

    When a financial analyst who only lives for work meets her true love, a laidback skateboarder, over a late night release party she wakes up next day realizing she got pregnant. In love as she is she decides to move in together with her newly found love and start family life. Though, to handle everyday family-life after 20 years as a workaholic puts her whole self-image back at work at stake!

    Tony Edward Samurai
    Added an answer on October 10, 2015 at 1:29 pm

    Karel's edit is good, mainly because it 'skates' over the fact that she discovers she is pregnant the day after having sex..?? Didn't know that this was physically possible. I also agree with Nir in that the MC's goal is very unclear -- you have a set-up with no clear idea of what the MC actually waRead more

    Karel’s edit is good, mainly because it ‘skates’ over the fact that she discovers she is pregnant the day after having sex..?? Didn’t know that this was physically possible. I also agree with Nir in that the MC’s goal is very unclear — you have a set-up with no clear idea of what the MC actually wants or has to do – I always think it’s best to start with knowing the goal and the obstacle should be born from that.

    Best of luck.

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  2. Posted: September 25, 2015In: Thriller

    A female bounty hunter holds a bar full of gangsters hostage in order to trap an escaped prisoner.

    Tony Edward Samurai
    Added an answer on September 26, 2015 at 4:26 pm

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  3. Posted: August 23, 2015In: Public

    The true life misadventures of a couple who try to save their failing marriage and reignite their dull sex life and relationship by daringly moonlighting as an ?escort duo? and experiencing the fantasies of others.

    Tony Edward Samurai
    Added an answer on August 26, 2015 at 9:23 pm

    ... or, to put it another way: at the moment, they are always WINNING. An audience gets engaged with the plight of a main character(s) when there is something clearly at stake and when they are STRUGGLING towards a goal, as in "...Their experiences don't always go smoothly..." -- you have to tell usRead more

    … or, to put it another way: at the moment, they are always WINNING. An audience gets engaged with the plight of a main character(s) when there is something clearly at stake and when they are STRUGGLING towards a goal, as in “…Their experiences don’t always go smoothly…” — you have to tell us, very specifically, in what way they don’t go smoothly…

    And is this a doco, a drama based on a (your?) true story, or complete fiction?

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