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An arrogant crime scene cleaner and her impressionable partner/best friend begin a messy murder spree to provide the work that’ll save their business from going under.
Dpg, two dark comedy of this nature come to my mind: - Delicatessen (a cannibal butcher and landlord) - In Bruge (two ruthless professional hit men)
Dpg, two dark comedy of this nature come to my mind:
See less– Delicatessen (a cannibal butcher and landlord)
– In Bruge (two ruthless professional hit men)
An arrogant crime scene cleaner and her impressionable partner/best friend begin a messy murder spree to provide the work that’ll save their business from going under.
I can see the absurbity of your story. You'd need flawless execution to make a film about two serial killers funny. I can think of two films of this genre: Delicatessen (a cannibal butcher) and In Bruge (two professional hit men). As for the logline, it's well written and most of the elements are thRead more
I can see the absurbity of your story. You’d need flawless execution to make a film about two serial killers funny.
I can think of two films of this genre: Delicatessen (a cannibal butcher) and In Bruge (two professional hit men).
As for the logline, it’s well written and most of the elements are there. What missing is the antagonist. You mentioned in your comments that the impressionable partner would become the antagonist later on. You want to incorporate this item into the logline. Without it, the story has no conflict, and when there is no conflict there is no story.
You may say something like:
See less‘An arrogant crime scene cleaner and her impressionable partner and best friend go on a messy murder spree to provide the work that’ll save their business from going under until the partner [make a decision that threatens their operation].
When her brother suddenly dies, an anxiety prone sister is forced to hatch an elaborate scheme to conceal the tragedy from her suspicious mother who stops at nothing to unravel the truth.
Hi Philippe, Thank you for your comments. Your dissection of the logline is very helpful. Reading your comments I realise that my logline is not clear and thus has caused confusion. The sister did not kill the brother. He died from an accident and, along with her family, she decides not to break theRead more
Hi Philippe,
Thank you for your comments. Your dissection of the logline is very helpful. Reading your comments I realise that my logline is not clear and thus has caused confusion. The sister did not kill the brother. He died from an accident and, along with her family, she decides not to break the tragic news to her fragile mother, for fear she would collapse.
The story is about a close family who is very protective of the mother. All characters in the story are adults and the mother is elderly and emotionally fragile. Her son is her pride and her life, sort to speak.
When the son dies from a car accident while the mother is overseas, the family decides not to tell her – hence the elaborate scheme to keep her in the dark – because they fear she’d not survive the horrific news. But the mother begins to question the bogus evidence the daughter shows her to make believe the son is still alive. She suspects that something might have happened to him and starts her own investigation.
This story is reminiscent of the French/Georgian film ‘Since Otar left’ or the American film ‘The Farewell’ where the family hides painful truth from their elders. This practice is prevalent in the Asian culture but rarely in the Western culture.
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