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After her kitten was kidnapped, a girl must team up with her friends to track down the thief by invading his home.
This sounds adorable! I agree with Scott that the goal of finding the motive for the kidnapping seems odd, would make more sense to find the kitten and the kidnapper. The stakes are great, especially for a family film. I imagine that the protagonist is a kitten-loving moral detective who is willingRead more
This sounds adorable! I agree with Scott that the goal of finding the motive for the kidnapping seems odd, would make more sense to find the kitten and the kidnapper.
The stakes are great, especially for a family film. I imagine that the protagonist is a kitten-loving moral detective who is willing to take on the case to help the poor kids who miss their kitten, and he/she is up against the big mean police chief who hates kittens and doesn’t think they are worth the time and taxpayer money. The police chief reluctantly gives him a couple of days to find the kitten before he cancels the investigation and sends the detective off to another job. Ultimately the detective is trying to prove that every small creature is important.
The longline could probably used some rewriting to reflect how adorable this story sounds, if that’s what you’re going for. For example, when a little girl’s kitten goes missing, a good-hearted detective must find the kitten and the culprit before the kitten-hating police chief cancels the investigation. Something like that, although I’m sure that you could write it better
See lessWhen a non-verbal young chef learns that her signature dish has been ripped off by a rival, she must win over a new elite clientele with her intuitive understanding of flavour and micro-dosing.
Yes, definitely lacking stakes. The stakes could come from a bet that she’s made with her rival to make more money or gain more restaurant stars or something similar. And her unique methods may help her win the bet but are also illegal so they could get her into even more trouble.
Yes, definitely lacking stakes.
See lessThe stakes could come from a bet that she’s made with her rival to make more money or gain more restaurant stars or something similar. And her unique methods may help her win the bet but are also illegal so they could get her into even more trouble.
When a veteran intelligence officer, struggling to adjust to post-war life, begins to find secret codes everywhere she must follow the trail to satisfy her obsession. No matter how far that takes her.
Good point. The question is whether she is imagining the codes and (her struggles to adjust to a “normal†life post war is driving her to imagine that she is still part of some great mission) or whether the codes are real and someone is really in trouble and dropping information that only she woRead more
Good point. The question is whether she is imagining the codes and (her struggles to adjust to a “normal†life post war is driving her to imagine that she is still part of some great mission) or whether the codes are real and someone is really in trouble and dropping information that only she would understand.
Also a lot of people who worked in intelligence after the war had to keep their wartime work secret. So adjusting to life as an under appreciated woman during the late 40s would have been very difficult.
So I guess something like: when a wartime intelligence worker struggling to adjust to an unsatisfactory life post-war begins to see codes everywhere asking for help, she must choose between accepting her life as it is or chasing a great adventure that may not be real.
^ very badly worded, but maybe that makes the protagonist’s struggle clearer
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