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Kriss Tolliday
Posted: September 21, 20122012-09-21T20:21:45+10:00 2012-09-21T20:21:45+10:00In: Public

An inexperienced lawyer becomes the centre of a hate campaign when his client is accused of hiding an identity that once brought a reign of terror to the world.

A DIRT OF HELL

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    2 Reviews

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    1. Richiev Singularity
      2012-09-21T20:38:18+10:00Added an answer on September 21, 2012 at 8:38 pm

      This logline is much clearer.

      Since the accusation (I assume) will be brought on early in the movie, would it give anything away to say something like:

      “An inexperienced lawyer becomes the center of a hate campaign when his client is accused of being the Devil”

      “An idealistic lawyer and his family are targeted by religious fanatics when his client is accused, by an over zealous reporter, of being the Devil.”

      I know; both those are a still a bit clunky.

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    2. Blue Parrot
      2012-09-21T23:35:06+10:00Added an answer on September 21, 2012 at 11:35 pm

      I see where Richiev is going but my first reaction is based on story choices, e.g. why would the Devil choose an inexperienced lawyer to be his council? There may be a good reason in your story but in the logline it pulled me up. Also, I think the conflict “he becomes the center of a hate campaign” is a bit amorphous. You need a singular antagonist for us to recognize the stakes. Memories of “The Devil’s Advocate” come up for me. That created irony with an “idealistic lawyer” discovering he is working for the devil. In your story I think you could up the irony by making the lawyer’s father a preacher. In that way the father-son relationship in the story is rich with possibilities as the son battles the devil.

      It’s just semantics but I would be tempted to use the term ‘Lucifer’ instead of Devil. You have a seedling of an idea with promise. Best of luck!!

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