Hey guys, I shot a short film and need a little help on my logline. It’s been bothering me for months! It’s a romantic comedy. Short film. Do any of you have any suggestions on cleaning it up? Would love any help I could get. Thanks guys. “After burying themselves in their work and away from their friends, Two broken-hearted Twenty somethings are taken for a night out by their respective friends, only to cross paths over a game of pool, and falling for each other in the process.”

Great work, Richiev!

I like your new version "...over a game of pool with emotional stakes higher than the winning shot."

It raises the stakes quite literally and it also adds a mysterious flavour to your romantic story.

Are you going to shoot the film by yourself? Well, your logline is working now!

"Mid-twenties and broken hearted, two workaholics reluctantly go for a night out with their respective friends and cross paths over a game of pool with emotional stakes higher than the winning shot."

I really like what you've done, Richiev. I'm gonna give it another go to try and shorten the length, I feel like you've put me on a much better path.