“Mrs. Doubtfire” meets “The Fault in our Stars”
beezeebeePenpusher
A terminal twenty-something comedienne who sacrificed her social life for unfulfilled stardom struggles to dupe the quixotic gigolo she falls for into becoming her hospice nurse so she won’t have to die alone.
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“terminal twenty-something female comedienne” = protagonist
“unfulfilled stardom” = inciting incident?
“dupe the quixotic gigolo she falls for into becoming her hospice nurse” = main character goal
Love the use of high concept in this logline – Doubtfire MEETS Fault in our Stars really activates the imagination. However, unfortunately struggling to match the characters up – obviously our 20 year old comedienne isn’t played by Mrs. Doubtfire!
If this were my logline, I’d go deeper on the inciting incident. “Unfulfilled stardom” is more of a character quality, than an actual event. Think “BOOM” -> something happens to this character – expected or unexpected – but their life is about to change, and change in a major way. The clue might be in what our impractical gigolo does to said comedienne. In other words, what is the major event that causes her to become a nurse?
I would say, being diagnosed with cancer would be the inciting incident since unfulfilled stardom is more of a situation, not a specific event.
Yep, that is right Richiev
“After she’s diagnosed with agressive cancer an unsuccessful comedian sells all she has in order to live the good life for her last few weeks, but trouble arises when the male escort she hires, so she won’t be alone, falls in love with her.”