When two escaped convicts get trapped on a runaway train, they must stop the train and evade the jail warden by being a team

dgp, i agree with you. my logline was missing the hook. I will concentrate on incorporating the hook of the story. Thanks.

When a runaway convict becomes trapped on a runaway train, he must choose between saving his life and being recaptured or dying a free man.

25 words. Yeah, I know it strips out the complications of the 2 other passengers, the warden in hot pursuit, yada-yada, but the hook, the truly compelling aspect of the story is the awful existential choice the plot forces the protagonist to make: live the rest of his life in a hellish prison run a sadistic warden or die a free man.

When a runaway convict becomes trapped on a runaway train, he must choose between saving his life and being recaptured or dying a free man.

25 words. Yeah, I know it strips out the complications of the 2 other passengers, the warden in hot pursuit, yada-yada, but the hook, the truly compelling aspect of the story is the awful existential choice the plot forces the protagonist to make: live the rest of his life in a hellish prison run a sadistic warden or die a free man.