The Hostage
CraigDGriffithsUberwriter
trapped behind enemy lines two soldiers must escape with a hostage that is playing them against each other.
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“Trapped behind enemy lines two American soldiers must escape with a captured Nazi intelligence officer who’s playing them against each other.”
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By adding Nazi we now know it’s WW2, if you could do the same, add a word or two to let us know time and place it would help.
Other than that I think this logline is on the right track.
“Trapped behind enemy lines two American soldiers must escape with a captured Nazi intelligence officer who’s playing them against each other.”
—–
By adding Nazi we now know it’s WW2, if you could do the same, add a word or two to let us know time and place it would help.
Other than that I think this logline is on the right track.
How could the prisoner play off one against the other unless he has some leverage, has a skill or knowledge that they don’t but desperately need get back to their own lines? What is his leverage? What [character] flaw in their relationship is he manipulating?
And if he is able to manipulate them, that would seem to make him a more interesting and compelling character than the 2 soldiers.
How could the prisoner play off one against the other unless he has some leverage, has a skill or knowledge that they don’t but desperately need get back to their own lines? What is his leverage? What [character] flaw in their relationship is he manipulating?
And if he is able to manipulate them, that would seem to make him a more interesting and compelling character than the 2 soldiers.
DPG makes a great point, you should add something in the description that might give us a clue to what the prisoner exploits.
“Trapped behind enemy lines, two American soldiers secretly in love with the same woman back home must escape with a captured Nazi intelligence officer who plays them against each other.”
DPG makes a great point, you should add something in the description that might give us a clue to what the prisoner exploits.
“Trapped behind enemy lines, two American soldiers secretly in love with the same woman back home must escape with a captured Nazi intelligence officer who plays them against each other.”
After having their squad wiped out, two soldiers trapped behind enemy must escape with a hostage that uses events to play them against each other.
or
Being sent in to capture a person of interest, two soldiers are trapped behind enemy lines with the hostage who uses event to play the soldiers off against each other and undermine their mission.
After having their squad wiped out, two soldiers trapped behind enemy must escape with a hostage that uses events to play them against each other.
or
Being sent in to capture a person of interest, two soldiers are trapped behind enemy lines with the hostage who uses event to play the soldiers off against each other and undermine their mission.
Neither of those two are really better because
A: We still don’t know who the soldiers are, American? German? Australian? Chinese?
B: We don’t know what setting, WW1? WW2? Bosnia? Vietnam? Iraq?
C: We don’t know the flaw the prisoner is exploiting.
And to be honest it really seems as though the captive should be the lead character.
“After she’s captured by two Nazi soldiers trapped behind allied lines, a quick thinking Woman Marine begins playing the two against each other in order to escape.”
Other than that it seems like a great idea, good luck with this!
Neither of those two are really better because
A: We still don’t know who the soldiers are, American? German? Australian? Chinese?
B: We don’t know what setting, WW1? WW2? Bosnia? Vietnam? Iraq?
C: We don’t know the flaw the prisoner is exploiting.
And to be honest it really seems as though the captive should be the lead character.
“After she’s captured by two Nazi soldiers trapped behind allied lines, a quick thinking Woman Marine begins playing the two against each other in order to escape.”
Other than that it seems like a great idea, good luck with this!
The setting is yet to be determined. I thinking it will be a non-real world, Sci-Fi near future feel. I am looking at having a strong narrative, so I am not keen for the environment to be a character in the story until it has to be.
They are sent to get someone. They don’t know why or who. Whenever thing goes bad the hostage tries to convince them he is a good guy and this is a rescue mission. One believes him the other doesn’t. This is the things he works on to drive a drift between them.
The story is about mistrust and how doing the right thing can still be wrong.
Thanks for the help.
Please feel free to keep commenting anyone. The more the merrier.
The setting is yet to be determined. I thinking it will be a non-real world, Sci-Fi near future feel. I am looking at having a strong narrative, so I am not keen for the environment to be a character in the story until it has to be.
They are sent to get someone. They don’t know why or who. Whenever thing goes bad the hostage tries to convince them he is a good guy and this is a rescue mission. One believes him the other doesn’t. This is the things he works on to drive a drift between them.
The story is about mistrust and how doing the right thing can still be wrong.
Thanks for the help.
Please feel free to keep commenting anyone. The more the merrier.
What Richiev said. The prisoner has the more interesting predicament, the pivotal role, seems to have the bigger and more interesting challenge.
What’s the dramatic question to be answered during the course of the story?
What Richiev said. The prisoner has the more interesting predicament, the pivotal role, seems to have the bigger and more interesting challenge.
What’s the dramatic question to be answered during the course of the story?
I think this would work better in a more tangibly real and familiar setting of a known war as appose to a scifi adventure in a non-real world.
The whole story is an analogy to the question; does the end justify the means. A sergeant once asked me if I would follow every command he gave me I said yes, he then asked if I would shoot a child at his command and I said no, he just replied think about it and I did. Later in my service I made a choice that to this very day I don’t know if I should be proud or ashamed of.
The point is that if you are able to establish beyond doubt that both soldiers are the most dutiful and loyal soldiers in the platoon and therefor chosen to cary out this secret mission. Then infuse into the readers mind the idea that one of the two solders has reasonable doubt that the captured man is a good guy this would be enough to create stakes for him. Pin these stakes up agains a their sense of duty and you have a great dilemma.
The external goal would be to extract the target where as the inner goal would be to over come duty for sensibility and humanity. The internal goal could then inform the outer journey and change it to save the target instead of deliver him to the commanders.
my quick little try;
After a special forces soldier realises his captive target could be innocent he must fight his partner whilst trapped behind enemy lines to prevent them completing their mission.
Hope this helps.
I think this would work better in a more tangibly real and familiar setting of a known war as appose to a scifi adventure in a non-real world.
The whole story is an analogy to the question; does the end justify the means. A sergeant once asked me if I would follow every command he gave me I said yes, he then asked if I would shoot a child at his command and I said no, he just replied think about it and I did. Later in my service I made a choice that to this very day I don’t know if I should be proud or ashamed of.
The point is that if you are able to establish beyond doubt that both soldiers are the most dutiful and loyal soldiers in the platoon and therefor chosen to cary out this secret mission. Then infuse into the readers mind the idea that one of the two solders has reasonable doubt that the captured man is a good guy this would be enough to create stakes for him. Pin these stakes up agains a their sense of duty and you have a great dilemma.
The external goal would be to extract the target where as the inner goal would be to over come duty for sensibility and humanity. The internal goal could then inform the outer journey and change it to save the target instead of deliver him to the commanders.
my quick little try;
After a special forces soldier realises his captive target could be innocent he must fight his partner whilst trapped behind enemy lines to prevent them completing their mission.
Hope this helps.
The story is a bit of a three hander. The two soldiers start out as a team, neither of them are senior. Cut off they are heading to the border to escape. Only being grunts they don’t know who or why this person is important.
One says torture, kill him and leave. The other is let’s keep him safe. This is the split the hostage exploits. He tries to convince one he is a deep undercover spy. The team end up turning on each other.
One soldier is now trying to escape the enemy and his own guy. The other must escape and hide the truth about trying to murder the hostage.
It ends with the hostage being a bad guy after all which leads to the death of both soldiers.
Some of the scenes feel like a police interview room.
The idea behind a SciFi bent is it allows for some tech we don’t have. Such as not being able to use communications otherwise being instantly found.
The story is a bit of a three hander. The two soldiers start out as a team, neither of them are senior. Cut off they are heading to the border to escape. Only being grunts they don’t know who or why this person is important.
One says torture, kill him and leave. The other is let’s keep him safe. This is the split the hostage exploits. He tries to convince one he is a deep undercover spy. The team end up turning on each other.
One soldier is now trying to escape the enemy and his own guy. The other must escape and hide the truth about trying to murder the hostage.
It ends with the hostage being a bad guy after all which leads to the death of both soldiers.
Some of the scenes feel like a police interview room.
The idea behind a SciFi bent is it allows for some tech we don’t have. Such as not being able to use communications otherwise being instantly found.