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Here is attempt number 2 (putting inciting incident first):
When scammed in a car purchase a reserved accountant seeks justice and inadvertently aggravates a psychotic car salesman.
Thanks for the feedback so far. Below is my much thought-out new attempt.
You are right, Mr Literal about his flaw. I originally gave him the wrong one. And Nir, I tried hard to put the inciting incident 1st but was hard to make it sound good.
Any extra feedback would be awesome:
When a reserved accountant seeks justice over a car rip off he inadvertently aggravates the psychotic car salesman.
Read up on logline conventions they exist for good reason, here is a helpful guide on this website:
https://loglines.org/howto/
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