Fandango1980

Penpusher · 175 points

125 points to Logliner

5 loglines
8 reviews

A disillusioned crusader returns home to find wife in danger of losing her soul.

September 4, 2017
When a desilliusioned crusader returns home to his wife and finds out that she has been absorbed by hell, he needs to get her out there before her soul becomes lost.

August 31, 2017
A retired superhero who lost his superpowers, needs to defeat his resurrected archrival once again, to save the world.

August 31, 2017
An uptight business man races against the clock to find a way out of purgatory or risks to lose his life.

August 29, 2017
Ex-Priest struggles against the Devil to prevent his just started B&B into a portal to Hell.

August 29, 2017

on When homicidal maniac escapes his cell in a locked-down mental health institution, greenhorn security guard must take a stand to survive and protect other patients.

Hey JanCabal, Good job! Sounds really interesting, something for a low budget film with only a few locations. Will this be a short or a feature? I cannot make it better at the moment. Thanks! Aschwin
on A smart real estate agent, has the career of a lifetime but her married life is an exact opposite of what she pretends it to be. One morning brings about secrets and lies that send her down a rabbit hole.

Hi Lz, Thank you for sharing your logline with us! A logline needs 3 parts... A protoganist an antagonist (force) and a goal. What we now have is a discription of a protoganist and her goal is to make her…
on An Israeli locksmith entangled in a turf war manipulates Google advertising to build a mobile empire from a call center in his living room.

Hey Ryan, Thank you for sharing your logline. I miss the stakes in this logline. What if Google refuses to build a mobile empire in his living room? Thanks, Aschwin
on Novel: A french teenager runs away to fulfill his dream of becoming an actor in L.A.

Hi Jumeriot! This is my second reply on a posted logline, so keep that in mind and I just want to help. Great! But why is this a great story to tell? What stands in his way? What happens? if…
on A mother to two clone children plans for more clone children, but she must make the world a place where they can survive, so she unleashes her ability to kill using only her brain, founding a world of potent and fertile.

Hi Rhea, Thank you for sharing your logline with us. This is for me also the first time to comment on another logline... I really try to understand what you want to tell with this logline. A logline needs 3…
on When a desilliusioned crusader returns home to his wife and finds out that she has been absorbed by hell, he needs to get her out there before her soul becomes lost.

Well, if you look at the series Supernatural everything is possible. :) This is more based on the story of Dante with the divine comedy. Anyways i was more interested if the logline is technically correct.
on Ex-Priest struggles against the Devil to prevent his just started B&B into a portal to Hell.

Hey Foxtrot 25, Thank you for you comment! Can I use Bed & Breakfast in your line? To give you a bit of a background on the story. Its about a priest that doesn't believe anymore due to dramatic events…
on An uptight business man races against the clock to find a way out of purgatory or risks to lose his life.

Hi All, Thank you all for reviewing my logline. Due to your questions I can make up the logline is not clear, hopefully?you can help me making a good logline. :) My question is actually does it really need to…