Zentaneous

Penpusher · 150 points

150 points to Logliner

2 loglines
6 reviews

In 1951,a physicist tasked with designing an early thermonuclear bomb, has a lesbian affair with her young lab assistant.She’s determined to complete the difficult design while struggling for survival when she discovers her lover to be a ruthless Soviet spy

June 6, 2016
A web of tragic events unfold when a love-starved atomic scientist allows herself to be seduced by a personable but moody lesbian teen whom she suspects of being a spy.

June 2, 2016

on An overworked suburban mother and professional hit women, reaches breaking point as she struggles to juggle the work life balance. ★ Accepted

I just want? you to continue working on this idea. It needs work as is, however the idea of stressed? fenle? hitman has some bite to it.??????? Sort of like Mr. and Mrs. Smith. Maybe a dark comedy? You know,…
on In 1951,a physicist tasked with designing an early thermonuclear bomb, has a lesbian affair with her young lab assistant.She’s determined to complete the difficult design while struggling for survival when she discovers her lover to be a ruthless Soviet spy

See? if this strikes a more positive chord.? Sorry about the punctuation,? lost something in cut and paste.
on An interstellar hitman is forced together with an intrepid, young archeologist in a race against a ruthless mercenary group to find the legendary fortune of an ancient civilization.

Lots of problems, beginning with the akward wording.? Better to say, hitman and archeologist.
on A lawsuit for his wife’s injury offers a homeless group leader a ticket out— until a member of his flock threatens to testify. Now he must resort to extreme measure to stop him.

I agree. Can you imagine a producer spending millions to produce a movie about homeless people, unless they have really compelling transitions. Better to make it about ordinary people.
on When a flippant prankster is ripped off by crazy scammer he seeks compensation but inadvertently starts a relationship with the scammer’s even crazier assistant.

I think you have a decent idea,? I like it.? However, needs work.??? Don't understand what a flippant prankster is.?? How does his relationship with even crazier assistant relate to his goal of seeking compensation?
on A web of tragic events unfold when a love-starved atomic scientist allows herself to be seduced by a personable but moody lesbian teen whom she suspects of being a spy.

Actually I have revised it slightly to: When a love-starved? atomic scientist with polio submits to her first lesbian affair she is thrilled, but later suspects her young lover of being both a spy and capable of murder. Hopefully the…

In 1951,a physicist tasked with designing an early thermonuclear bomb, has a lesbian affair with her young lab assistant.She’s determined to complete the difficult design while struggling for survival when she discovers her lover to be a ruthless Soviet spy

A web of tragic events unfold when a love-starved atomic scientist allows herself to be seduced by a personable but moody lesbian teen whom she suspects of being a spy.