?When a broken hearted assault victim finds self-defence classes, a hidden talent for martial arts is unlocked. Her powers are challenged by an enemy Kung Fu clan who seek to destroy her and the school.?

The inciting incident and the goal need to be more closely related. They work as a question and an answer. The inciting incident poses a question to the protagonist – what do you do when a shark kills a tourist on your beach? The goal is how the protagonist chooses to answer it – you try to kill the shark.

With this in mind, if your goal is for the protagonist to defend the school and defeat the enemy clan then the inciting incident is the appearance of the clan. The inciting incident in this new version doesn’t really pose a question. It should be an event that flips the protagonist’s life upside down – a dramatic event. I think the discovery of a talent for martial arts is not dramatic enough. Unless it’s like superpowers… but even then, in every superhero film the inciting incident is usually the appearance of the supervillain.

If you’re worried it sounds clich?d mix it up. Consider how you can make it different. Personally, I think her backstory is the key. She’s been dealt a lot of crap and this martial arts talent could finally make her feel strong enough to go out and hunt down the bastards that raped her. Kung-fu Vigilante? This would set up an inner journey of victim -> empowered -> acceptance whilst on a quest for vengeance. Throw in a training montage and a cool 80s soundtrack and you can count me in!

Hope this helps.