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A desolate fugitive is forced out of hiding when his vengeful ex-partner in crime kidnaps his son.
'Desolate', as an adjective applied to a person means they are 'wretched or greatly unhappy'. Why is the hero so unhappy before his son is kidnapped? Considering he is in hiding, did you mean 'reclusive'? In general, the story you describe is too generic. I feel like I've seen this movie a million tRead more
‘Desolate’, as an adjective applied to a person means they are ‘wretched or greatly unhappy’. Why is the hero so unhappy before his son is kidnapped? Considering he is in hiding, did you mean ‘reclusive’?
In general, the story you describe is too generic. I feel like I’ve seen this movie a million times in one form or another.
Try and spice it up by suggesting a greater struggle for the hero, e.g. he’s a successful fugitive living in Mexico and must cross back across the border and risk being caught by the FBI in order to rescue his son from his vengeful ex-partner in crime.
See lessWhen a machete-wielding crew chases a young gang member, he?s forced to drive incognito with a Hassidic geriatric to complete a drug run.
Hassidic?Okay,? so why not also make the kid Jewish? Non-observant. (Or at least 1/2 Jewish. )Or if you really want to get the Hassidic's knickers in a wad,, have the kid's father be an Aborigine. Oy vey!Anyway, have the Hassidic scholar rebuke him for the path his life is going down.? Have an honesRead more
Hassidic?
Okay,? so why not also make the kid Jewish? Non-observant. (Or at least 1/2 Jewish. )
Or if you really want to get the Hassidic’s knickers in a wad,, have the kid’s father be an Aborigine. Oy vey!
Anyway, have the Hassidic scholar rebuke him for the path his life is going down.? Have an honest-to-Elohim conflict of age, culture race,, ethics, the Torah and the Talmud.
If you’re going to throw two people in the same car for the duration of a long ride, give them something to argue about.
See lessAfter a machete wielding gang murder his partner, a vengeful drug mule hides with a geriatric cripple in his station wagon, to chase and kill the psychotic crew.
This logline works pretty well, although I agree it could be shorter.? However,? the problem that comes through in the character of the mule. His only characteristic is that he is vengeful - which happens during the story. Who is he before this? Also, is a simple drug mule really going to become anRead more
This logline works pretty well, although I agree it could be shorter.? However,? the problem that comes through in the character of the mule. His only characteristic is that he is vengeful – which happens during the story. Who is he before this? Also, is a simple drug mule really going to become an enforcer? If he was a violent character, wouldn’t he normally have ended up in some other role than mule? Has he snapped, or have they mistakenly messed with the wrong guy?
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