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  1. Posted: February 24, 2020In: Crime

    When a machete-wielding crew chases a young gang member, he?s forced to drive incognito with a Hassidic geriatric to complete a drug run.

    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on February 25, 2020 at 1:53 am

    Hassidic?Okay,? so why not also make the kid Jewish? Non-observant. (Or at least 1/2 Jewish. )Or if you really want to get the Hassidic's knickers in a wad,, have the kid's father be an Aborigine. Oy vey!Anyway, have the Hassidic scholar rebuke him for the path his life is going down.? Have an honesRead more

    Hassidic?

    Okay,? so why not also make the kid Jewish? Non-observant. (Or at least 1/2 Jewish. )

    Or if you really want to get the Hassidic’s knickers in a wad,, have the kid’s father be an Aborigine. Oy vey!

    Anyway, have the Hassidic scholar rebuke him for the path his life is going down.? Have an honest-to-Elohim conflict of age, culture race,, ethics, the Torah and the Talmud.

    If you’re going to throw two people in the same car for the duration of a long ride, give them something to argue about.

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  2. Posted: February 20, 2020In: Crime

    After a machete wielding gang murder his partner, a vengeful drug mule hides with a geriatric cripple in his station wagon, to chase and kill the psychotic crew.

    FreeWill Logliner
    Added an answer on February 22, 2020 at 10:33 pm

    This logline works pretty well, although I agree it could be shorter.? However,? the problem that comes through in the character of the mule. His only characteristic is that he is vengeful - which happens during the story. Who is he before this? Also, is a simple drug mule really going to become anRead more

    This logline works pretty well, although I agree it could be shorter.? However,? the problem that comes through in the character of the mule. His only characteristic is that he is vengeful – which happens during the story. Who is he before this? Also, is a simple drug mule really going to become an enforcer? If he was a violent character, wouldn’t he normally have ended up in some other role than mule? Has he snapped, or have they mistakenly messed with the wrong guy?

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  3. Posted: February 17, 2020In: Crime

    After being diagnosed with an terminal illness, a radio host take down drug lords in order to pay for her cancer treatment.

    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on February 19, 2020 at 8:24 am

    Reads like a knock off of "Breaking Bad".

    Reads like a knock off of “Breaking Bad”.

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