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After being diagnosed with an terminal illness, a radio host take down drug lords in order to pay for her cancer treatment.
Reads like a knock off of "Breaking Bad".
Reads like a knock off of “Breaking Bad”.
See lessArriving in Australia to find her brother missing and the police unwilling to conduct an investigation, a relentless Indian woman follows clues and her gut as she heads deeper into a dangerous underground world of racism and hatred.
This is certainly a topical story idea.A crude rewriteWhen an Indian woman comes to Australia to find out why her brother has vanished, she must overcome the ethnic hatred of the local police chief and community to discover what happened before her visa expires.(36 words)Notes:*Hit the ground with tRead more
This is certainly a topical story idea.
A crude rewrite
When an Indian woman comes to Australia to find out why her brother has vanished, she must overcome the ethnic hatred of the local police chief and community to discover what happened before her visa expires.
(36 words)
Notes:
*Hit the ground with the plot in 1st gear. shifting into 2nd.? She’s visiting Australia because he’s vanished.? No one she’s contacted from India has a clue or seems to care.
*ID the main character sooner rather than 1/2 way into the logline.
* Suggest persistent or tenacious may be better terms for her defining characteristic.
*The general ethnic bias lacks a face.? It should be personified in a primary antagonist.? Like a police chief who has no interest in investigating his disappearance .
* Visa:? inserts a ticking clock, a deadline, for her to solve the case. (Albeit, the standard tourist visa is good for 12 weeks.? Maybe too long for the narrative.? Maybe there an be some constraint that requires her to leave sooner.? Like she only has so much money.? Whatever.)
Best wishes with the script.
fwiw
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See lessThe wife and mistress of a loathed man conspire to execute a perfect plan that makes it appear he accidentally drowned in a swimming pool — and then the body disappears.
Zordyceps:You raise a good point.? I would have worded the logline differently if the murder were the heart, the story hook of the French film.But the murder isn't really the main conflict.? In the film, the main conflict that dominates the 2nd half of the film is what the two women do AFTER the bodRead more
Zordyceps:
You raise a good point.? I would have worded the logline differently if the murder were the heart, the story hook of the French film.
But the murder isn’t really the main conflict.? In the film, the main conflict that dominates the 2nd half of the film is what the two women do AFTER the body disappears (and the disappearance is the story hook). How the mistress, in particular, tries to figure out what happened without betraying what they did.
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