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SMITHEREENS II – Sue finally understands her mother’s suicide after her crime cleaning business changes everything.
Maybe it s just me but i feel like 5his lacks the basic requirements to be called a logline. Some more work is needed, checking a couple of logline tutorials would help.
Maybe it s just me but i feel like 5his lacks the basic requirements to be called a logline. Some more work is needed, checking a couple of logline tutorials would help.
See lessAfter he?s hired on a potential bank fraud job,a budding young investigator discovers all clues lead to himself and must track down the impostor as his sworn enemy and former boss is hired on same.
Why is the bank fraud only a potential? Best to make it a bank fraud job and make the stakes higher with real criminals.The second half of the sentence has many grammar errors in it as well as a few logic flaw that make it hard to understand. Is the 'impostor' he must track down the one who committeRead more
Why is the bank fraud only a potential? Best to make it a bank fraud job and make the stakes higher with real criminals.
The second half of the sentence has many grammar errors in it as well as a few logic flaw that make it hard to understand.
Is the ‘impostor’ he must track down the one who committed the bank fraud? Did you mean the one who tried to incriminate him? If so best to specify this as there was no mention of identity theft prior to this in the logline. Secondly is his former boss his sworn enemy as well and is this the same person who is trying to incriminate him?
Does he need to clear his name, catch the real bad guy or stop his sworn enemy or boss?
The plot is unclear because of the confusing elements above, best to specify one antagonist and one goal.
See lessA private investigator must uncover the truth behind the murder of a rich doctor in a remote country mansion, but is perplexed by stories of a Welsh phantom haunting the residence.
Why must he uncover the truth? What is the inciting incident? The logline doesn't dramatize the motivating event that pushed the main character to do what he or she does. If all the main character is doing is their job then the story will be rather weak, is there an event out of the ordinary that haRead more
Why must he uncover the truth? What is the inciting incident?
The logline doesn’t dramatize the motivating event that pushed the main character to do what he or she does.
If all the main character is doing is their job then the story will be rather weak, is there an event out of the ordinary that happens to this investigator which propels them into the plot?
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