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When his arm gets trapped under a giant rock in the Grand Canyon, a man must decide how much he values his own life and how far he will go to preserve it.
127 Hours (2010). The movie was based upon a real life incident. Noting that in the logline strengthens the hook of the logline. The hook of the logline is that it's a true story of a man who faces an awful dilemma: he must cut off his arm -- or die. It's a do or die plot predicament -- and that's wRead more
127 Hours (2010). The movie was based upon a real life incident. Noting that in the logline strengthens the hook of the logline.
The hook of the logline is that it’s a true story of a man who faces an awful dilemma: he must cut off his arm — or die. It’s a do or die plot predicament — and that’s what the logline should focus on. That predicament was the story hook that attracted the interest of acclaimed director Danny Boyle.
So, maybe:
The true life story of a mountain climber who, when his hand gets trapped under a boulder in a remote canyon, must cut it off or die.
(27 words versus 33 words for the logline posted. With loglines, less is more.)
See lessA frustrated architect works on soulless industrial projects, with the dream of building his ideal building.
Hi, Rick! You’ve got a character flaw and some internal motivation which is great. But now you need an external conflict or opposition.
Hi, Rick! You’ve got a character flaw and some internal motivation which is great. But now you need an external conflict or opposition.
See lessWhen a young video store clerk receives a proposition to make a snuff movie from a mysterious man, he decides to convince his friend to kidnap a girl and make the movie.
It’s definitely got potential, but here is a more concise version that I think captures the essence in fewer words: After a video store clerk receives a mysterious proposition to make a snuff movie, he convinces his friend to kidnap a girl in order to make it... I put the ellipses at the end becauseRead more
It’s definitely got potential, but here is a more concise version that I think captures the essence in fewer words:
After a video store clerk receives a mysterious proposition to make a snuff movie, he convinces his friend to kidnap a girl in order to make it…
I put the ellipses at the end because I think something could be added that maybe focuses in on the moral dilemma or the stakes a bit more.
For example, you could say something like “After a young video store clerk receives a mysterious proposition to make a snuff movie, he convinces his friend to kidnap a girl in order to make it, but things take an unexpected turn when they realize she’s a serial killer.”
That’s not perfect either as you ideally want to aim for a logline that’s 30 words or less, but hopefully that will get you on the right track! 🙂
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