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After his wealthy wife dies, a reclusive and callous high school teacher wants to honour her dream of becoming a concert pianist.
The story has a decent EVENT ('the death of his wife'), and we understand that this can motivate change in a character's life, as well as inspire them to act. The character is interesting, in that he is reclusive and callous (mind the capitalisation error). However, 'decides' is not an exciting actiRead more
The story has a decent EVENT (‘the death of his wife’), and we understand that this can motivate change in a character’s life, as well as inspire them to act.
The character is interesting, in that he is reclusive and callous (mind the capitalisation error).
However, ‘decides’ is not an exciting action for a screen story. We need to be able to visualise the action from the logline.
‘To become a concert pianist’ doesn’t excite me either. This does not promise a movie that is worth watching.
You may have the beginning and the end to a story, but the middle is what you need to entertain an audience with. There needs to be struggle, determination, and incredible odds. We need to be able to anticipate tension, and be compelled to take the POV of the character.
At this point, the logline is not inspiring this (yet).
See lessA disenfranchised (unstable) taxi driver seeks violent justice for passengers he feels have been wronged. He is pursued by a detective who is willing to cross the line to bring him to justice.
TV?
TV?
See lessWhen he killed himself, he left five letters to five people in his life giving each a special task which he believed would bring them happiness. These are their stories.
"The lives of five hardened people are transformed when a quest for happiness letter arrives from a ghost of the past" Struggling with whom to spotlight, the ethos told me to envision this dead man narrating their journey, so I went with that 😉 Take care, Mike.
“The lives of five hardened people are transformed when a quest for happiness letter arrives from a ghost of the past”
Struggling with whom to spotlight, the ethos told me to envision this dead man narrating their journey, so I went with that 😉
Take care, Mike.
See less