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a frustrated female werecat trying to be with the woman she loves discovers an ancient secret hidden beneath the city and fights alongside a surprising ally to prevent all out destruction
"...a frustrated female werecat trying to be with the woman she loves..." this part of the logline adds nothing relevant to the plot. Best to cut that part and change it to a character flaw that will make it harder for her to achieve her goal. As Richiev noted, the discovery of a danger to the wholeRead more
“…a frustrated female werecat trying to be with the woman she loves…” this part of the logline adds nothing relevant to the plot.
Best to cut that part and change it to a character flaw that will make it harder for her to achieve her goal.
As Richiev noted, the discovery of a danger to the whole city is a the inciting incident – many lives are suddenyl at risk. This means that her goal will be to stop the destruction and it needs to be described as such in the logline.? Best to include the type of danger the city is in and the action she will take to stop it.
See lessA man with no combat magic potential, uses and abuses support magic in order to show how powerful it’s potential is.
"Combat Magic" ?can mean.... anything. ?The protagonist needs a specific magical ability or skill. (Like Rudolf: ?his only claim to fame,?the only thing he has going for him that makes him stand out from his peers is his aberrant nose. ?Not his antlers, not his hoofs -- his nose. )
“Combat Magic” ?can mean…. anything. ?The protagonist needs a specific magical ability or skill.
(Like Rudolf: ?his only claim to fame,?the only thing he has going for him that makes him stand out from his peers is his aberrant nose. ?Not his antlers, not his hoofs — his nose. )
See lessOn the verge of a succession crisis, a good mermaid princess is banished from her kingdom to the human world for her forbidden love of humans; but when her two wicked sisters usurp their father’s throne and destroy each other in a power struggle to rule the kingdom alone, she must choose between humanity and saving her people from the tyranny of her sisters.
Agreed with all the above comments. Also, and this may be a wording issue, I'm not clear on who gets destroyed. Do the sisters kill the king and then destroy each other? Or do they destroy someone or something else in the process? Who is the MC needing to save her people from?
Agreed with all the above comments.
Also, and this may be a wording issue, I’m not clear on who gets destroyed. Do the sisters kill the king and then destroy each other? Or do they destroy someone or something else in the process? Who is the MC needing to save her people from?
See less