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A bank manager invests 245 million dollars in an airport that does not exist, he must hunt down his scammers to save his bank from bankruptcy and going to jail.
I thinks that it would work better if you present the SCAM in a more precise way: for example, a bank manager loses 245 million dollars in an elaborate scam of an unexistent airport and must track down his scammers to save his freedom.
I thinks that it would work better if you present the SCAM in a more precise way: for example, a bank manager loses 245 million dollars in an elaborate scam of an unexistent airport and must track down his scammers to save his freedom.
See lessWhen a skeptic psychiatrist witnesses his pregnant wife being abducted by aliens, he teams up with his abductee patient in order to get her back.
I like this. I think "skeptic" might not be the right choice for his characteristic. Only because it's resolved as soon as he witnesses his wife's abduction. Chances are, within the first 15 mins or so, this arc is completed. I'd kinda like the goal to be expanded on a little. I'd like to know moreRead more
I like this.
I think “skeptic” might not be the right choice for his characteristic. Only because it’s resolved as soon as he witnesses his wife’s abduction. Chances are, within the first 15 mins or so, this arc is completed.
I’d kinda like the goal to be expanded on a little. I’d like to know more specifics about how they’re planning on getting her back. Maybe his abductee patient has a set of skills? I’d just like to be able to visualise their actions in Act II a little more.
Looking forward to seeing where this goes.
Hope this helps.
See lessWhen two wannabe American Pickers accidentally release a demon from the strange storage unit they just won, they must track down the eccentric billionaire who reneged on the payment to discover what the creature was and how to stop the thing.
Best to have a sing protagonist not 2. It seems to me unnecessary to mention that they won the unit. The face is they opened a unit that they purchased. What will happen if they don’t stop the demon ? What is motivating the protagonist to act in this way and what will happen to him/her if they canRead more
Best to have a sing protagonist not 2.
It seems to me unnecessary to mention that they won the unit. The face is they opened a unit that they purchased.
What will happen if they don’t stop the demon ?
What is motivating the protagonist to act in this way and what will happen to him/her if they cannot fin the previous owner of the unit.?
See less