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  1. Posted: May 14, 2020In: Comedy

    A down-on-his-luck videographer breaks his estranged mother out of prison to steal the grand prize from a filthy rich YouTuber – a million-dollar Bitcoin.

    Best Answer
    Odie Samurai
    Added an answer on May 16, 2020 at 5:16 am

    Based on the input thus far, this is where I am now with the logline: A bankrupt cameraman breaks his estranged master thief mother out of prison to steal the grand prize from a filthy rich YouTuber ? a million-dollar Bitcoin. OR Should I change "master thief " to something completely ridiculous - lRead more

    Based on the input thus far, this is where I am now with the logline:

    A bankrupt cameraman breaks his estranged master thief mother out of prison to steal the grand prize from a filthy rich YouTuber ? a million-dollar Bitcoin.

    OR

    Should I change “master thief ” to something completely ridiculous – like pickpocketing? Breaking out mom because she has master thief skills to steal makes sense but not funny, him breaking out mom because she stole some wallets and he thinks that’s enough to pull this heist off is funny.

    A bankrupt cameraman breaks his estranged pickpocketing mother out of prison to steal the grand prize from a filthy rich YouTuber ? a million-dollar Bitcoin.

    Suggestions are welcome, I would love to get a laugh out of the logline.

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  2. Posted: May 11, 2020In: Romance

    After falling in love with twin sisters, an irresolute Iranian student has to decide with whom he wants to spend his life with before getting forcibly married to an unkown woman by his family.

    Best Answer
    Mike Pedley Singularity
    Added an answer on May 14, 2020 at 7:28 pm

    Making a decision is not an objective visual goal. It happens in the character's head. How is this represented on screen? "After falling in love with twin sisters" - an inciting incident should be one moment, one scene - a shark eats a tourist/he discovers a lost alien in his bike shed etc. After heRead more

    Making a decision is not an objective visual goal. It happens in the character’s head. How is this represented on screen?

    “After falling in love with twin sisters” – an inciting incident should be one moment, one scene – a shark eats a tourist/he discovers a lost alien in his bike shed etc. After he fell in love with the first, he suddenly falls in love with the second too? I worry that he’s coming across as someone who doesn’t really know what he wants and it’s difficult to get behind a protagonist who doesn’t have a clear objective.

    I think the whole arranged marriage element is interesting. However, I’m conscious that it’s been done before – Brick Lane, The Big Sick, Arthur – so what’s different here? I agree wholeheartedly with yqwertz with this feeling like a male-fantasy, with two dimensional female characters.

    Conflict wise, I agree there is some conflict to be found AFTER he’s made his decision. But, before this point, all the conflict is inside his head. What’s happening on screen?

    Hope this helps.

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  3. Posted: May 8, 2020In: Drama

    When a suicidal FBI agent is assigned to infiltrate a prison drug ring, his life is saved by two lifers and a bond forms, however, his new friendships soon thwart his mission.

    Odie Samurai
    Added an answer on May 14, 2020 at 6:30 am

    What if: Instead of suicidal ? the FBI agent was a powder keg or loose cannon? Like Mel Gibson's character in ?Lethal Weapon?. He is known in the agency as the only one who can pull this off. I have not seen crazy cop in a while and miss it ? The reason why he is crazy? He is hooked on ?super buff?Read more

    What if:

    Instead of suicidal ? the FBI agent was a powder keg or loose cannon? Like Mel Gibson’s character in ?Lethal Weapon?. He is known in the agency as the only one who can pull this off. I have not seen crazy cop in a while and miss it ?

    The reason why he is crazy? He is hooked on ?super buff? or whatever name you want to call the drug this ring is pushing. So, I reversed your plot, he is infiltrating to take control of the US operations for this drug, a bond is still formed with the two lifers – but they are there to stop him.

    Take care.

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