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While working at a junkyard he finds an old radio which can help him hear to whoever he wants from President of US to his cheating girlfriend anyone.
This is an interesting premise, but could use some work as a logline. There is some emotion within the conflict this character could have with the world around him, yet there seems to be no clear antagonist to the film currently. A logline with an antagonist and stakes could look like this: "A JunkyRead more
This is an interesting premise, but could use some work as a logline. There is some emotion within the conflict this character could have with the world around him, yet there seems to be no clear antagonist to the film currently. A logline with an antagonist and stakes could look like this:
See less“A Junkyard worker in a dying relationship finds a radio that allows him to listen to whoever he wants, even his unfaithful girlfriend.”
This is a rough draft for a logline, but your premise is exceptionally fascinating with practically limitless possibilities for conflict. Hope my encouragement for a clear antagonist and stakes doesn’t come across rude or harshly.
In Quito, Ecuador, an indigenous singer and dancer with powers to slow down or advance time uses them as a resource to make decisions that always make her happy; as she grows older, what she doesn’t imagine is that she will believe she is losing them, thus changing the whole course of her life.
This is really good! I’d love to read/watch it. I can only think of it benefiting from conciseness. Things like replacing singer and dancer with performer, and replacing the power description with something like “time manipulation powers” and of course rearranging the other words/sentences to fit.
This is really good! I’d love to read/watch it. I can only think of it benefiting from conciseness. Things like replacing singer and dancer with performer, and replacing the power description with something like “time manipulation powers” and of course rearranging the other words/sentences to fit.
See lessWhen a clinical study to create a vaccination that lowers heart attack risks accidentally creates a novel deadly flu variant, a medical missionary is forced to team up with the virus’s creators to stop a potential global pandemic that could kill millions. The missionary nun and her spy companions are forced to rely on a brutal Russian biocontainment unit if they are to escape from the Caribbean island’s deranged dictator and find a cure to prevent a global disaster.
This is so interesting! You clearly have a clear understanding of the story you want to write, but less might be more. Cutting down some details about the virus itself could leave more room to talk about the other things. Also removing passive language raised the stakes and hook more people! An examRead more
This is so interesting! You clearly have a clear understanding of the story you want to write, but less might be more. Cutting down some details about the virus itself could leave more room to talk about the other things. Also removing passive language raised the stakes and hook more people! An example using just what you’ve written:
When a clinical study accidentally creates a deadly flu variant, a medical missionary is forced to team up with the virus’ creators to stop a global pandemic. The missionary nun and her spy companions are forced to rely on a brutal Russian bio containment unit if they are to escape from the Caribbean island’s deranged dictator and find a cure to prevent a global disaster.
See less