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  1. Posted: August 7, 2019In: Crime

    After a string of murders in rooms sinisterly decorated like scenes out of children?s books, a burned-out detective must connect the victims and follow the clues back into his own past to stop the killer

    [Deleted User]
    Added an answer on August 7, 2019 at 7:24 am

    About a year ago I read "The Godfather Notebook", a collection of notes Francis Ford Coppola made while writing and directing "The Godfather".? His technique for condensing the sprawling book down to a shooting script was to come up with a one word description of the theme.?? After wrestling with thRead more

    About a year ago I read “The Godfather Notebook”, a collection of notes Francis Ford Coppola made while writing and directing “The Godfather”.? His technique for condensing the sprawling book down to a shooting script was to come up with a one word description of the theme.?? After wrestling with the book for weeks, the one word description he came up with was:

    “Succession”

    The Godfather was a story of a struggle to determine who would succeed Don Vito Corleone.

    He wrote the word on an index card and taped it by his typewriter.? That index card was his North Star for navigating through the book, writing the script.

    It’s a technique I’ve tried to adopted for my own projects.? Operative word: tried.? I can’t say I can summarize all my current projects in just one word.? But at least I’ve been able to summarize the overarching theme in 2-3 words.

    Now then.? What do you consider to be a one word summary of your operative theme?? Or two?? Or three?

    After reading your summary, the word that first came to my mind was “revenge”.? He wants revenge against a system that let the deviant creep get away. And then it occurred to me that a more emotionally compelling theme might be “redemption”.?? Yes, the system was flawed, but he could have, should have pushed harder.? However, he was a rookie he couldn’t pull rank; and he didn’t want to damage his prospects for promotion so he acquiesced to his superiors.? And so…

    Anyway, just spitballing and trying to get a better focus on the plot.? It’s your story, of course.? Best wishes.

    fwiw

    BTW: Have you viewed Episode 3 of Prime Suspect, starring Hellen Mirren?? It’s about the cover up of a pedophile ring.? Strongly recommend, imho, one of best episodes in the widely acclaimed series.

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  2. Posted: August 4, 2019In: Action

    When a rookie martial artist’s first covert target is to eliminate innocent children, she refuses to complete the mission and must fight the deadly forces tracking them down and find the truth of their identities.

    Best Answer
    Richiev Singularity
    Added an answer on August 6, 2019 at 9:33 am

    I don't know all the details; like why the children are targeted or who the lead character works for, so your logline will be different, however as an example how about something like this:--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------"Read more

    I don’t know all the details; like why the children are targeted or who the lead character works for, so your logline will be different, however as an example how about something like this:

    ————————————————————————————————————–

    “When she refuses an order to kill the children of her organizations enemies, a Yakuza Assassin must now save the very children she had been ordered to eliminate.”

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  3. Posted: August 3, 2019In: Crime

    A bereaved father and assassin descends into delirium as he murders a group of anonymous teenage boys one by one for the Mexican cartel, unaware the final target is his long thought dead son.

    [Deleted User]
    Added an answer on August 5, 2019 at 1:29 am

    Why would a movie audience pay to watch a film about a nutjob ("descends into delirium") killing teenagers for an evil organization ("the Mexican Cartel"); teenagers who may be innocent as well as "anonymous" -- whatever that means? Who is the audience supposed to root for?

    Why would a movie audience pay to watch a film about a nutjob (“descends into delirium”) killing teenagers for an evil organization (“the Mexican Cartel”); teenagers who may be innocent as well as “anonymous” — whatever that means? Who is the audience supposed to root for?

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