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  1. Posted: May 20, 2017In: SciFi

    In the dark days following World War II, two enterprising brothers are torn apart by dark, sinister forces and made bitter enemies as they emerge from the wreckage of their PBM in the Bermuda Triangle.

    Foxtrot25 Uberwriter
    Added an answer on May 23, 2017 at 2:14 am

    A PBM was a plane/boat that could bomb -- used in WWII and afterwards.

    A PBM was a plane/boat that could bomb — used in WWII and afterwards.

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  2. Posted: May 20, 2017In: SciFi

    A dark, sinister agent tears apart once inseparable brothers into fierce, hateful rivals as he plots to destroy the protagonist and his family for opposing his rule as a demi-god on ancient Earth.

    MitchW Logliner
    Added an answer on May 20, 2017 at 10:19 am

    Maybe you could try something like this: When a demi-god tears a loving brother from his family, he must find a way to destroy the rule the demi-god has over ancient Earth and reunite with his family.

    Maybe you could try something like this:

    When a demi-god tears a loving brother from his family, he must find a way to destroy the rule the demi-god has over ancient Earth and reunite with his family.

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  3. Posted: May 20, 2017In: SciFi

    Planet Earth is under alien occupation by the Reptilian Armada and their High Commander Rigel, is in search of his future Queen Sasha. Bound by a prophecy; Rigel and Sasha will marry bringing forth a child blending the bloodlines and forming an alliance between both their planets.

    MitchW Logliner
    Added an answer on May 20, 2017 at 10:01 am

    From what I've read it seems like you're writing the High Commander as the main character. I agree with the others that Sasha should be the main character so that you can have your audience empathise with her, but at this point you need and event (inciting incident) that forces her to do an action.Read more

    From what I’ve read it seems like you’re writing the High Commander as the main character. I agree with the others that Sasha should be the main character so that you can have your audience empathise with her, but at this point you need and event (inciting incident) that forces her to do an action. I think I could see this story being about Sasha trying to escape from a marriage that the alien race are trying to force upon her? Just an idea.

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