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A fighter pilot wakes in an isolation ward, suffering memory loss from an experiment she supposedly signed up for. She and the other patients are told they can leave as soon as their memories return, but when people start disappearing or ending up dead, they suspect something more sinister is going on.
Agree with the others.I especially like FFF's suggestion to develop the story backwards. ? ?More than most, "amnesia" stories demand a Big Big Reveal, a Big Payoff on the premise.?
Agree with the others.
I especially like FFF’s suggestion to develop the story backwards. ? ?More than most, “amnesia” stories demand a Big Big Reveal, a Big Payoff on the premise.?
See lessA time-traveling hitman wakes up in his next hit anytime he sleeps. When he learns of a remedy that cures fatigue, he betrays the mob in search of their mad-scientist’s invention.
I ?agree with FFF that while the time traveling hit man has been done, time traveling remains a rich vein for drama.For me, the hook in this logline is that his time traveling is triggered by sleeping; he falls asleep in one "time zone", wakes up in "another". ?I'm intrigued by the set up -- but notRead more
I ?agree with FFF that while the time traveling hit man has been done, time traveling remains a rich vein for drama.
For me, the hook in this logline is that his time traveling is triggered by sleeping; he falls asleep in one “time zone”, wakes up in “another”. ?I’m intrigued by the set up — but not by the plot that follows or, at least, not as the dramatic problem is framed.
I hope you will continue to develop and polish the concept..
See lessTo pay off a debt, an infamous bounty hunter is forced into an unlikely alliance with a young, bookish girl to track down the legendary fortune of an ancient galactic civilization.
>>>I was inspired by films such as Indiana Jones, and...That's what came to mind when I read the logline: ?Indiana Jones in space. ? However, ?one plot plus element in the Indiana Jones franchise that I don't see in ?this story is a?rival for the "McGuffin", Albert Hitchcock's term for theRead more
>>>I was inspired by films such as Indiana Jones, and…
That’s what came to mind when I read the logline: ?Indiana Jones in space. ? However, ?one plot plus element in the Indiana Jones franchise that I don’t see in ?this story is a?rival for the “McGuffin”, Albert Hitchcock’s term for the thing that everyone in the story wants.
In “Raiders of the Lost Ark” and “The Temple of Doom”, Nazis were pursuing the same object as Indiana. ?In “The Temple of Doom” his objective goal is to reclaim a sacred rock stolen by a secret cult.
I suggest that the dramatic tension in your story needs to be ratched up by a rival for the legendary fortune. ?The story needs to have someone who wants it as badly as the bounty hunter does — but, like the Nazis in the Indiana Jones franchise, ?wants it for some evil purpose.
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