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  1. Posted: April 3, 2018In: SciFi

    Trapped in his outer body experience, a pro lucid dreamer cooperates with his skeptic rivals to wake up before the league organizer reaps their awareness.

    Jessie Samurai
    Added an answer on April 5, 2018 at 12:42 am

    Would you consider an extra line for the world?s setup? Here?s a random attempt: In a lucid-dreaming competition, the commonly despised champion must convince his competitors to cooperate with him to escape the imaginary world created by the game-master, holding their consciousness ransom.

    Would you consider an extra line for the world?s setup?
    Here?s a random attempt:

    In a lucid-dreaming competition, the commonly despised champion must convince his competitors to cooperate with him to escape the imaginary world created by the game-master, holding their consciousness ransom.

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  2. Posted: March 22, 2018In: SciFi

    Revised: After her children are taken, on account of her mental illness, a holier-than-though mother must reclaim them, by undergoing a life-threatening VR therapy: defeating embodiments of her demons in simulated combat.

    Best Answer
    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on March 27, 2018 at 12:16 pm

    >>>on account of her mental illness, a holier-than-though mother What dramatic purpose is served by her being "holier-than-thou"?? She's already mentally ill.? Isn't that enough?

    >>>on account of her mental illness, a holier-than-though mother

    What dramatic purpose is served by her being “holier-than-thou”?? She’s already mentally ill.? Isn’t that enough?

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  3. Posted: March 24, 2018In: SciFi

    When a corporate party is interrupted by overdosed terrorists, a party member races against the clock to save the others and the building before going blind and losing the building in an explosion that could wipe out half the city and the tracks of the terrorists.

    Jessie Samurai
    Added an answer on March 24, 2018 at 3:57 pm

    Ok, fair enough. How about something like this? When a corporate party is violently disrupted by armed drunks, a timid employee, left for dead, must find reluctant allies and the courage to fight back, before losing his mind to the drug keeping him alive.

    Ok, fair enough.

    How about something like this?

    When a corporate party is violently disrupted by armed drunks, a timid employee, left for dead, must find reluctant allies and the courage to fight back, before losing his mind to the drug keeping him alive.

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