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  1. Posted: February 4, 2016In: Thriller

    In order to save her abducted daughter, a desperate American expatriate must stop an inexorable Nigerian terrorist from launching a nuclear attack on Nigerian soil.

    Best Answer
    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on February 5, 2016 at 1:15 pm

    Agree with Richiev.?? There needs to be a more direct, causal connection between the kidnapping and the bomb threat.? As he does in his suggested logline.? And?I like the plus factor he adds, the ticking clock, only?24 hours to save his daughter.

    Agree with Richiev.?? There needs to be a more direct, causal connection between the kidnapping and the bomb threat.? As he does in his suggested logline.? And?I like the plus factor he adds, the ticking clock, only?24 hours to save his daughter.

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  2. Posted: February 4, 2016In: Thriller

    After winning the trials, a fiery adolescent girl is prized with becoming the body of a coldhearted AI.

    Richiev Singularity
    Added an answer on February 5, 2016 at 12:26 pm

    From your logline, I can't tell if this is the beginning of the story or the end of your story. Is the story what happens next and this is just the set-up? Or does she win the prize... The END

    From your logline, I can’t tell if this is the beginning of the story or the end of your story.

    Is the story what happens next and this is just the set-up?
    Or does she win the prize… The END

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  3. Posted: February 3, 2016In: Thriller

    A tenacious art forgery expert, is dragged back in time when her brother?s diary reveals the location of stolen diamonds in a heist masterminded by her father.

    dpg Singularity
    Added an answer on February 4, 2016 at 7:48 am

    CraigDGriffiths confusion is understandable.?? Also, while a story may include flashbacks, a logline should focus on the forward movement of the story in time.? Even when the story is about coming to some reckoning?with an unpleasant past, it is done by means of action in the present tense toward aRead more

    CraigDGriffiths confusion is understandable.?? Also, while a story may include flashbacks, a logline should focus on the forward movement of the story in time.? Even when the story is about coming to some reckoning?with an unpleasant past, it is done by means of action in the present tense toward a future objective goal.

    King Oedipus is “dragged back in time” to? reckon with his past, but that is not his dramatic purpose, his objective goal.? His objective goal is find out?the crime — who did what?– that has so?offend ?the gods that they have cursed the city of Thebes with the plague.

    So if it?is?not the case that the woman’s intentional objective goal is to be dragged back into the past, then what is it going forward?? What does she want to do, what must she do as a result of the information revealed in her brother’s diary?

    And what are the stakes for her?? And who opposes her effort? Is there competition — a villainous rival also seeking the stolen diamonds? (If not, why not?)

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