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After accidentally causing the death of her boss, an over-worked, guilt-ridden barmaid must avoid suspicion, while at the same deflecting the advances of her lascivious co-worker
Well-written. I think the logline would benefit from specifying how the barmaid caused the death of her boss. "After accidentally poisoning and killing her boss, an over-worked... etc" Additionally, though this is a more minor point, I think the actions the protagonist take in the story could also bRead more
Well-written. I think the logline would benefit from specifying how the barmaid caused the death of her boss.
“After accidentally poisoning and killing her boss, an over-worked… etc”
Additionally, though this is a more minor point, I think the actions the protagonist take in the story could also benefit from more specificity. Does she try to pin the blame on someone else, for example?
See lessWhen she discovers that she let in a strange being in the guise of her dead son, she will be forced to make a decision, before the damage is greater.
She will be forced to make a decision? I don't know what that looks like on screen.
She will be forced to make a decision? I don’t know what that looks like on screen.
See lessA man is accused by a fortune teller of being guilty of a series of crimes, which have not yet been committed; and what seemed like a bad joke turns into a nightmare when the police arrive looking for him, considering him the main suspect in a murder. Now he must flee to prove his innocence, before another death occurs.
"When he is accused by a fortune-teller of a murder he has not yet committed, a mild-mannered accountant must prove his innocence when the murder actually occurs and he becomes the main suspect by the authorities."
“When he is accused by a fortune-teller of a murder he has not yet committed, a mild-mannered accountant must prove his innocence when the murder actually occurs and he becomes the main suspect by the authorities.”
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