Blood Letting
A blood thirty time traveller frames a pretty vampire for murder. She has to prove his guilt or she and her clan will die.
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Mixing a scifi time travel genre with the vampire genre can be interesting but I think this is running the risk of genre confusion. Is the time travel essential to the plot Ala’ ‘Back To The Future’? Or is it just a plot device to get the characters together?
If the later then it is unnecessary and could possibly cloud the plot by making the concept confusing.
Is the time traveler a vampire as well? Or just likes killing? Why will she and her clan die if she doesn’t prove her innocence? This lack of logic between the plot elements further confuses the concept. If this is made to be the stakes for the MC then she would have a compelling motive to take action.
My try:
After being framed for murder by a serial killer a vampire must prove her innocence to appease the local town folk and prevent them from slaying her entire clan.
Hope this helps.
Do vampires have laws that make the whole clan responsible when one member murders someone? You’re simply saying you have a story about someone having to prove their innocence after being framed. I don’t think throwing vampires into the mix makes your story unique enough. What else can you give us?
I can’t take anyone seriously who doesn’t proofread their work, especially something as short as a logline. Neither will anyone else in the industry. Please clean this up and get back to us.
I’m confused. If the time traveler is framing the vampire, then why does the vampire have to prove that the traveler is guilty? Please elaborate.
Stating that he is blood thirsty shows you what kind of character he is, I like that. But It is unnecessary to say that she is pretty.