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Han_HeyaLogliner
A broken woman tries to find her way by deciding whether to pursue her own path or go down the path her lover had begged her to.
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This is an interesting logline. I hope it can turn into a great movie.
Here is why vague is bad:
1: The lead character wants to stay home with her family who hold her back and take advantage of her, but she is comfortable, it’s simply her life. Her lover believes in her art and wants the lead to take a chance, fly to Paris and work on her dreams. But that is scary to the lead character
(In this story, the lover is the good guy trying to get the protagonist to live up to her potential
2: The lead loves her job and her friends, Her lover wants her to move across the county to where his new job is, and only wants the lead to stay at home and be a trophy wife.
(In this story, the lover is selfish and doesn’t have the best interest of the lead character at heart.
The fact that both stories, no matter how opposite could fit your logline shows your logline needs some specifics in order to hook the reader.
What is her own path?
What is the path her lover wants her to go down?
Unless the logline reader can visualize it, it won’t hook them.
A logline is not a statement about the protagonist deciding whether to decide.? A logline is about the decision made, what a protagonist does in response to the inciting incident.
So what is the inciting incident?? And what does the woman decide to do in response to the inciting incident?