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Michael FineLogliner
Posted: November 8, 20192019-11-08T00:41:10+10:00 2019-11-08T00:41:10+10:00In: Horror

A group of rich, snobby college students take their wheelchair-bound female friend to a cabin for the weekend where they are attacked by a pack of female zombies. The students can?t figure out why until the girl discovers that these students murdered them? and they are seeking revenge!

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    4 Reviews

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    1. Best Answer
      thedarkhorse Samurai
      2019-11-08T19:50:06+10:00Added an answer on November 8, 2019 at 7:50 pm

      A wheelchair bound student and her friends fend off female zombies, whilst trapped in a cabin, however she soon discovers her friends murdered them – and are seeking revenge.

      It’s a cool concept. Well done.

      We’ve got a trapped scenario/crucible.

      A unique character – there’s plenty of empathy for wheel-chair bound zombie fighters.?

      A live or die scenario.

      A fish out of water (she’s surrounded by zombies and murderers and she’s like the only normal one).

      A dilemma – get killed by zombies or fight alongside the murderers.

      A twist/hook – her friends are the murderers.

      So yeah…

      Good luck.

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    2. Best Answer
      Neer Shelter Singularity
      2019-11-08T16:11:32+10:00Added an answer on November 8, 2019 at 4:11 pm

      It would be better to rewrite the logline so the main character is seen as such from the beginning regardless. The switch in perception that you’re talking about might work against you. Also, better to reduce the word count, at 48 words this is too long for a logline.

      Try to focus on the wheelchair girl’s point of view, what was the very first thing that motivated her to either stop the zombies or do something to the college students? This way, you’ll be able to clarify her goal, a vital element currently missing in the logline.

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    3. Best Answer
      Michael Fine Logliner
      2019-11-08T10:07:13+10:00Added an answer on November 8, 2019 at 10:07 am

      Thanks for your review and great advice on rearranging the logline!

      The idea is that the wheelchair bound girl ends up being the protagonist, but at first we think all the guys (and especially the main rich kid, her “boyfriend”) is the protagonist who is the key character fighting the zombies. As the girl discovers her boyfriend and his friends killed the female zombies when they were alive, she turns on her friends and becomes the protagonist and the MALE students become the ANTAGONISTS.! The catch here is that the ZOMBIES THEMSELVES become the good guys who are killing scummy people.

      My idea is that the movie is a metaphor for MeToo where the rich and powerful men are first seen as heroes (Harvey Weinstein, anyone?) and then the women form a group and together are able to exact justice.

      Looking forward to hearing what you think and thanks a million for your feedback!

      -MF

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    4. Best Answer
      Richiev Singularity
      2019-11-08T09:26:34+10:00Added an answer on November 8, 2019 at 9:26 am

      Solid premise, similar to Ghost Story, but with zombies.

      After reading the logline a couple of times, I am getting the impression that the wheelchair-bound friend is the lead character but the logline is written as if the rich, snobby college students are the main protagonists.

      As a result, (And if I am correct) What is the lead character’s goal? Does she want to save her friends? Does she want to escape? Does she want to defeat the vengeful zombies?

      I like the story idea, but I think the logline should be re-arranged just a little bit to emphasize the lead character and her goal.

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