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ZiBaricon
Posted: December 30, 20122012-12-30T09:30:12+10:00 2012-12-30T09:30:12+10:00In: Public

A man?s wife is murdered while investigating undead shadow people, leading him to delve into the nature of these creatures.

Noir

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    3 Reviews

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    1. bryson
      2012-12-30T11:48:58+10:00Added an answer on December 30, 2012 at 11:48 am

      I like the idea but I do have one question. Do I assume that the wife if murdered by the shadow people or is there someone else involved that is also investigating (or protecting) them and trying to prevent the man and his wife from finding out about them? Please don’t let my question be leading in anyway. I saw another way at looking at what your story may be about.

      You refer to the shadow people as creatures; is that how you want the viewer to perceive them?

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    2. ZiBaricon
      2012-12-30T10:58:16+10:00Added an answer on December 30, 2012 at 10:58 am

      Thank you very much for the feedback! This is my first time ever doing a logline and I think I got caught up in making it as short as possible rather than clear.

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    3. debbiemoon Penpusher
      2012-12-30T10:18:31+10:00Added an answer on December 30, 2012 at 10:18 am

      Could be interesting; feels a little vague at the moment. What does ‘delve into the nature of’ actually mean? Is he going to avenge his wife, strike a deal to bring her back to life, find out that she was betraying him with a shadow creature, or that she is one…? All of those are possible from that logline, yet they’re very different movies…

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