A Round
A successful golf instructor reconnects with his appetite and love of the game, when he agrees to share his round with a younger raw sportswoman.
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Round of golf is eighteen holes.
I’m not really sure what “sharing a round” means – playing together, I guess, but what’s the timescale – one game? A season?
This sounds like there’s going to be a competition here (just a guess) but i can’t understand what the golf instructor stands to achieve, his motivation. You have described him as successful, you didn’t say he was getting rusty, bored, so what made him lose his appetite in the first place. Then he shares his round with a younger sportswoman – sounds like ACT I, what happens after that or what is likely to happen next?. You should make it more catchy to a potential reader. Right now you haven’t given enough description to stimulate interest.
I see him as successful but disilusioned and the course of the game he will decide how to go on with his career. So the something that happens, is mainly he overcomes the mistakes he has made and sees a way to put them right.
Not too familiar with golf at a professional level. But see this as a amateur round where I believe men and women can play together. If not, then I’ll make it part of the story that his influence allows her to have a game.
It is very much a drama piece.
So far, all I see is “two people play golf”.
Another way at looking at this is – ‘When he agrees to share a round with a younger raw sportswoman, a successful golf instructor (something needs to happen here) reconnects with his appetite and love of the game.’
I mean, I guess we’ve got an inciting incident in agreeing to play with the young woman and we have a resolution in the instructor rediscovering what made him play golf in the first place, but we don’t have what exactly it is that connects these two events.
Also, I’m not sure how familiar you are with the game of golf, but there are quite a few obvious differences between regular golf and ‘ladies golf’ which may make “sharing a round” difficult.