Logliner
Posted: 2016-10-06T01:22:10+10:00 In:

A temporary infection storms over the world. Eight strangers are trapped in a restaurant and start experiencing the outcomes of the infection. At each 15 minutes they trade bodies with each other, and their memories go back to when the infection started, leaving they unaware of who they really are.

A temporary infection storms over the world. Eight strangers are trapped in a restaurant and start experiencing the outcomes of the infection. At each 15 minutes they trade bodies with each other, and their memories go back to when the infection started, leaving they unaware of who they really are.
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    2 Reviews

    1. Singularity

      This seems more like the incident that sets the story in motion rather than the story itself. I think what they do about this situation would be the story.

      The lead character usually has a goal and there is something standing in the way of that goal. I would express the goal and the opposition to the goal in the logline and it will be much improved.

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    2. Singularity

      “…The proble is, we dont have a protagonist here…” – YUP!

      I strongly suggets you read the ‘Training’ tab on the top bar, your loglines lack crucial elements and are too long.

      In this case the plot becomes a device to trap a group of unsuspecting misfits together, and the stories that evolve as a result of their interpersonal conflicts are what make up the film.
      On face value this runs the risk of being melodramatic and appeal to a very small number of audiences. What made the Cube work so well was the constant risk to the characters lives – they could have been killed by an unknown force at any time, BUT they could equally escape the killing force with team work and their own smarts.

      In your case they are all infected and have nothing to do to stop the infection, there is no big but they could do this… So the audience havn’t got that glimmer of hope that they’ll get out of the situation unscathed in the end. The body swap element is confusing in my mind, not sure how it fits in with the plot or how it contributes to the story.

      Bottom line is: What is their goal? To survive, but how will they achieve it…?

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