"After a struggling writer’s sister is kidnapped by deranged script writer, he’s given 24 hours to create the perfect logline for the maniacs new screenplay, or his sister dies!"

So what must this writer do? How can he save the his sister?

1st; He should discover the scripts “Inciting incident” the scene that gets the ball rolling: “After his sister is kidnapped”

2nd; he should take a look at the lead character and us an adjective to describe him: (But unless he’s famous he shouldn’t give the character a name) “A struggling writer”

(Also, he should make sure the logline is told from the perspective of the lead character, not the antagonist, don’t start the logline with “After a deranged script writer kidnaps…” that is telling the logline from bad guys perspective)

3rd, He should have a goal or an action: “He must create the perfect logline”

4th; he should tell us who the antagonist is: “a deranged script writer”

Finally; how can he improve upon the logline. What if the writer had “writers block”?? Now the lead character must overcome his writers block to save his sister.

Hope that helped, good luck with all your loglines!!! 🙂

Good point, dpg, sort of a “Misery” type situation. great input as always!

of course I’m not deranged… just don’t look too closely in my basement 🙂

“After a struggling novelist with writers block is kidnapped by deranged script writer, he?s given 24 hours to create the perfect logline for the maniac’s screenplay or die!”

It is if he is asked to write or die, lol

Great feedback Valentin!

For Tag line 4 you could add: Life’s a pitch… then you die!