Penpusher
Posted: 2016-05-21T00:13:13+10:00 In:

An angel living as a human being is brutalized by the police and now humanity must fight for its survival.

An angel living as a human being is brutalized by the police and now humanity must fight for its survival.
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    4 Reviews

    1. Best Answer
      Singularity

      As if in the last 6,000 plus years, the divine powers-that-be haven’t been given enough provocation to exterminate our species? And the tipping point is one angel living under cover who gets roughed up? ?The punishment seem all out of proportion to the offense.

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    2. Best Answer
      Penpusher

      Thanks for the comment … u would love this because its who this one angel is…and its nt a simple script

      • 0
    3. Best Answer
      Uberwriter

      Agreed with dpg, you need to convey why the assault on this angel sparks this doomsday. Also, define the protagonist or group the story is following. Say what they are doing to survive.

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    4. Best Answer
      Singularity

      “…Humanity must fight for it’s survival”
      —–
      You should have one specific character who must complete one specific trial, in order to save humanity.

      Having the lead character be, ‘humanity’ which after the inciting incident, ‘must fight for survival’ does not draw in the reader.

      There is a quote, “Kill one person, it’s a tragedy, kill a million and it’s a statistic.” (Generally attributed to Joseph Stalin) For that reason;

      Focus your story on one human and one goal to save humanity instead of the entire human race and your logline will draw in the reader.

      Hope that helped, good luck with this!

      • 1