Bleeding in the middle of a job, a hit woman must fight off a distressed woman for the last pack of tampons, before she misses her marked man.
mariechanelPenpusher
Bleeding in the middle of a job, a hit woman must fight off a distressed woman for the last pack of tampons, before she misses her marked man.
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I like the first line, it’s intriguing.
Woman coming up twice in the same line is tripping me up a bit. (i humbly suggest with all respect) Maybe distinguish each woman so they are unique.
Maybe mention the period somewhere, i feel like tampons coming up with no context is a bit surprising or maybe confusing, like she’s gonna put tampons on a bullet wound because she’s a hit woman.
I like the concept though, should be fun to watch.
With respect.
DC
Hello,
this is original and interesting.
I just can’t see how a feature lenght movie can be built on this – is it for a short movie ? Maybe you can include in the logline what kind of “force” prevent the womens to go to another shop… ?I heard there was a “tampon” crisis in a south american country, this could be a surreal setting for a social satire?movie.
http://www.theguardian.com/money/us-money-blog/2015/jan/08/tampon-shortage-argentina-foreign-creditors-import-trouble
I give it a try :
“With?the tampon?shortage?at its highest, two bleeding womens fights for?the last pack in town”
One woman could fight for her date, the other for her career breaking meeting.