Logliner
Posted: 2017-02-01T05:32:30+10:00 In:

“When two brothers feud over having to play with each other, one enters a cheat code into their video game, and the two are sucked into a game world, where they must battle bosses, and beat levels, to win, or be stuck in the game world forever.” – Cheat Code Kids – by Judah Ray

“When two brothers feud over having to play with each other, one enters a cheat code into their video game, and the two are sucked into a game world, where they must battle bosses, and beat levels, to win, or be stuck in the game world forever.” – Cheat Code Kids – by Judah Ray
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    2 Reviews

    1. Penpusher

      The idea of getting sucked into a video game is a marketable idea, I think for kids/families.

      I think the logline shows a lot of the first 10 pages, the setup. ?What if you just started at:

      “Two argumentative brothers, become trapped in a video game….” ?I don’t know if argumentative is the right adjective to show the conflict or personalities of your MC’s of course. ?Maybe you want to get across that they are opposites and state their qualities?

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    2. Singularity

      Why?

      Don’t get me wrong, this isn’t a bad logline, but it is kind of random. Why them? Millions of people play video games. Seems odd that two random brothers would be sucked in.

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