Down on his luck Security Guard Brooklyn Merewether?s day isn?t off to a good start but things are about to change as he saves the life of someone who has the power to make his existence a bit more enjoyable, a bit more tolerable, actually a lot damn better… he saves Cupid.
DackVigilantePenpusher
Down on his luck Security Guard Brooklyn Merewether?s day isn?t off to a good start but things are about to change as he saves the life of someone who has the power to make his existence a bit more enjoyable, a bit more tolerable, actually a lot damn better… he saves Cupid.
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This says nothing about what HAPPENS in this movie. No stakes, no goals, nothing. For all you’ve told us, he saves Cupid and Cupid says thank you and gets back to what he was doing and that’s the end of it.
What you have presented is the set-up to the story but not the story itself. The story would be what he does after saving? Cupid.
For instance:
——————
“When a lonely security guard saves Cupid, he is granted one wish, but when he asks him to pierce the worlds biggest?supermodels heart, even Cupid might not be able to make that love connection happen.”
Seems too long and disjointed. Don’t use names.
Remember the basics: Main character, Event and his action in response.
Perhaps:
When a luckless Security Guard saves the life of Cupid he must examine his own motivation before he can celebrate real romance.
Cupid is the god of desire, erotic love, attraction and affection (Google Search Result)
If you can somehow relate THAT—to your protagonist’s “dramatic need”—Since “Down on his luck…” doesn’t establish the need (and thus role) of Cupid in his loveless life
Good Luck DackVigilante!!