Samurai
Posted: 2018-03-23T03:07:35+10:00 In:

Revised: When a bumbling alien pollutes the timeline, he and his adopted human family must travel back in history, and prevent the apocalypse? again!

Revised: When a bumbling alien pollutes the timeline, he and his adopted human family must travel back in history, and prevent the apocalypse? again!
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    4 Reviews

    1. Best Answer
      Singularity

      After reading your logline, it is difficult for me to tell when the backstory ends and when the actual story begins.
      I am also unclear what must actually be done because,?”interfere in key historical events” is vague. You should pick a specific event.
      Here would be an example of picking a specific event that must be changed in order to stave the apocalypse.
      ——
      “When a well-meaning?but bumbling alien interferes in our timeline, causing the end of human civilization, he must?go back in time and prevent a brash reality star from becoming President to save mankind.”

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    2. Best Answer
      Singularity

      Since you say this is part of a series, I will make another?attempt at a logline example.
      ——————————————————————————————————–
      “When a bumbling but well-meaning?alien pollutes the timeline, a group of rogue humans must travel?back in time to clean up the anomalies and save the world from an apocalypse.”

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    3. Best Answer
      Singularity

      I have to admit your logline got me thinking about a different story.

      what if there was a service, like ‘total recall’ where you could go back in time and meet your hero.
      The lead character has always had a crush on Marilyn Monroe,
      He goes back in time to meet her, and they have a magical night together talking about their hopes and dreams and getting to know one another.
      but the lead character breaks the rules and confesses he is from the future.

      When the lead character gets back, the timeline is changed and an evil dictator is in charge of the world.

      His night with Marilyn gives her hope for the future and confidence in herself.
      She doesn’t have an affair with Kennedy but instead convinces Kennedy he should be faithful
      Kennedy takes a vacation with his wife instead of going to Dallas…
      Kennedy lives and servers 2 terms, his brother Robert is the next president for?8 years

      Robert Kennedy’s Vice-president wins and becomes an evil dictator.

      Now in order to save humanity, the lead character must go back in time and kill Marilyn Monroe.

      He must do it, but can he do? Can you kill one person you love in order to save millions you don’t even know?

      ~Killing Marilyn~

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    4. Best Answer
      Logliner

      I think this is getting close. ?I think you can cut “well-intentioned” because his adopted human family means he’s got to be fairly friendly. ?bumbling is enough. So this is sci-fi comedy I take it? ?Not sure pollute is the right word, but close.

      When a bumbling ?alien pollutes our timeline, he and his adopted human family must travel back in history to prevent the apocalypse? again!

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