Addition.
jamesmichaelPenpusher
Grace cannot stop counting things. It has cost her her job as a teacher and shut her off from the rest of the world. But meeting Seamus opens up the possibility of a normal life. Unfortunately becoming normal is a lot harder than Grace thought.
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Here’s what I learn from this logline:
Grace is quirky. This will be a quirky film.
“meeting Seamus”: It’s girl meets boy.
Seamus is quirky.
“Becoming normal”: inner journey only.
What is Grace’s objective? Getting her job as a teacher back? Marrying Seamus?
None of this is clear. We have NO idea what this movie will be about and being the cynic I have become (from seeing previously failed films with similarly poor loglines), I suspect it is about nothing and it will fail in every market.
Unless of course the filmmakers are brilliant storytellers, only they can’t put it in a logline. Yeah, right.
We have a main character, her profession and an interesting flaw. I’m getting an “As good as it gets” vibe, but with the girl having the OCD.
But, I agree with Karel, what’s the story? What is her clear obtainable goal, and what is stopping her from achieving it?
There’s nothing here of compelling interest. The protagonist (Grace) clearly has a flaw, but no compensating strength or heroic or noble qualities. She also does not face any great challenges in the overt story. Worse than that, her goal (to be ‘normal’) is so lame and mediocre that it hardly is a goal worth having. Why could she not at least want to, say, paticipate in some TV talent contest? That at least would set up interesting tensions and conflict. Finally, meeting Seamus could be a nice touch, but we have no idea of what he is like. And therefore no sense of how he might inspire or push Grace to overcome her insecurities. Dull protagonist with mediocre goals is all too typical of Australian films. The logline tells us nothing distinctive nor interesting about this story.
Steven Fernandez (Judge)