Sign Up Sign Up

Captcha Click on image to update the captcha.

Have an account? Sign In Now

Sign In Sign In

Forgot Password?

If you'd like access, Sign Up Here

Forgot Password Forgot Password

Lost your password? Please enter your email address. You will receive a link and will create a new password via email.

Captcha Click on image to update the captcha.

Have an account? Sign In Now

Sorry, you do not have permission to ask a question, You must login to ask a question.

Forgot Password?

To see everything, Sign Up Here

Please briefly explain why you feel this question should be reported.

Please briefly explain why you feel this answer should be reported.

Please briefly explain why you feel this user should be reported.

Logline It! Logo Logline It! Logo
Sign InSign Up

Logline It!

Logline It! Navigation

  • Sign Up
  • Logline Generator
  • Learn our simple Logline Formula
  • Search Loglines
Search
Post Your Logline

Mobile menu

Close
Post Your Logline
  • Signup
  • Sign Up
  • Logline Generator
  • Learn our simple Logline Formula
  • Search Loglines
Jaybird1091Logliner
Posted: October 31, 20132013-10-31T05:30:43+10:00 2013-10-31T05:30:43+10:00In: Public

In a future city where women are bought and sold, the last married man on Earth takes on the city?s annual, gladiatorial game to win the ultimate grand prize: his wife.

The Arena

  • 0
  • 2 2 Reviews
  • 845 Views
  • 0 Followers
  • 0
Share
  • Facebook

    Post a review
    Cancel reply

    You must login to add an answer.

    Forgot Password?

    To see everything, Sign Up Here

    2 Reviews

    • Voted
    • Oldest
    • Recent
    1. wlubake
      2013-10-31T14:02:56+10:00Added an answer on October 31, 2013 at 2:02 pm

      Getting really close with this, I feel. A few minor notes. First, by saying “in a future city where”, it suggests that the rest of the world isn’t trading in women. Just the city. Thus, to escape this terrible environment, all he has to do is move a few miles away. I think what you mean is, “In a future where women are bought and sold”. Also, I feel like the phrase “last married man on Earth” does little to add to our intrigue in the character. Here’s the hook: a man fighting in a gladiatorial game to win his wife back. I don’t think that is elevated by him being the last married man on earth. Final note, you don’t need the comma between annual and gladiatorial. Annual describes “gladiatorial games” rather than just games.

      Therefore, my final suggested logline would be: “In a future where women are bought and sold, a desperate man takes on his city’s annual gladiatorial game to win the ultimate prize: his wife.”

      Good work and good luck.

      • 0
      • Reply
      • Share
        Share
        • Share on Facebook
        • Share on Twitter
        • Share on LinkedIn
        • Share on WhatsApp
    2. kjk11
      2013-11-05T14:03:42+10:00Added an answer on November 5, 2013 at 2:03 pm

      Great suggestion above. I would just change “takes on ” to: enters.

      • 0
      • Reply
      • Share
        Share
        • Share on Facebook
        • Share on Twitter
        • Share on LinkedIn
        • Share on WhatsApp

    Sidebar

    Stats

    • Loglines 7,997
    • Reviews 32,189
    • Best Reviews 629
    • Users 3,710

    screenwriting courses

    Adv 120x600

    aalan

    Explore

    • Signup

    Footer

    © 2022 Karel Segers. All Rights Reserved
    With Love from Immersion Screenwriting.